


Hugs

by Kat_Greenleaf



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: And Loving, Basically, Bromance, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Cuddles, Gen, Healing, Hugs, Hurt Steve Rogers, Kinda, Recovering Steve Rogers, Sparring, Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers Has Issues, Steve Rogers Has PTSD, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Steve Whump, Thor (Marvel) is Not Stupid, Touch-Starved, and chickens, bucky’s getting more comfortable with steve, clint has a farm, cuddle-fest, dad tony stark, even if i didn’t like clint’s fam in aou they have a certain charm, lots of hugging, non sexy shower scene, sad Steve Rogers, some chapters are not in steve's pov, steve gets weird when he gets tired I guess, the team is very accomodating, tony stark is a badass, touch-starved Steve Rogers, vague mentions of torture, yay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-04
Updated: 2018-10-21
Packaged: 2019-01-08 20:01:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 27,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12261135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kat_Greenleaf/pseuds/Kat_Greenleaf
Summary: Steve doesn't have it together all the time. Sometimes, he just needs a helping hug from his teammates.





	1. Hugs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony learns the difference between Rogers and Steve.

Tony didn’t know what he was going to do with himself the next couple of days. Natasha and Clint were on a mission, Thor was off-world, and Bruce was visiting Dr. Cho’s lab. He and Rogers had gotten in another argument just a day ago, and Cap was the only other Avenger currently in the Tower. And Tony didn’t really want to see him. He’d said as much a day ago at the end of their argument. Rogers’ face had gone oddly stony, and he’d told Tony that he wouldn’t need to worry about it. Tony had made sure by staying in his lab.

But he had to come up and grab food. He’d promised Pepper that he’d start eating regularly. So, if he was going to hunker down in his lab for a while, he needed to stock up on food. He wasn’t really expecting to see Rogers sitting in the common room as he passed by. He was going to just ignore him and keep going to the kitchen, but something caught his eye.

He’d never, ever seen Rogers slouch. The man had always been tenser than… he couldn’t even think of a good comparison. He took a few steps closer, but Rogers didn’t seem to notice. He was hunched over, arms braced on his knees as he stared down at the carpet.

His whole face was… sad.

Since when was Captain America sad?

Rogers’ eyes held no focus, like he was staring off into nothing. Tony had heard about the infamous thousand-yard-stare that soldiers often acquired when returning from war. Rhodey had it from time to time, even. But nothing could compare with what he saw in front of him. The pain and sadness… the complete lack of a focal point… the slouch… even the duck of his head…

No, Stark. Keep walking. Walk away. Walk away Stark…

But he couldn’t.

“Hey, Cap!” he heard himself call.

Rogers’ posture snapped back to perfection so fast that Tony’s spine ached in sympathy. He turned and froze up when he spotted Tony.

Well shit.

“Hey… You alright out here?”

Rogers just stared a few more moments before standing and starting to hurry past Tony, out of the room.

“Yes, sorry. I’ll just… get out of your way…”

He didn’t sound right, either; his voice to soft, too low to be anything normal or good. Tony reached out to stop him before he even realized he was doing it.

“Wait.”

Rogers froze up again under Tony’s touch. Tony could understand, considering the harsh words he’d spat at him the day before. But it still made him cringe inside.

“What?” Rogers turned his head only just enough to look back at Tony, voice still impossibly quiet compared to its normal, commanding tone.

“I… Well…” Tony didn’t know how to respond to that. To any of this. It was such a change from Rogers’ usual behavior. How was he supposed to handle this?

“Do you…” Think, Stark. Come on, what do sad people want?

He wracked his brain only a few more seconds before blurting out: “Do you want a hug?”

Rogers was staring at him again; had turned and was staring at Tony, confused. Tony opened his arms a little, trying to follow through with his words, but that just made Rogers more bewildered.

“What?” he asked again, considerably more confused this time.

Tony was asking himself the same thing. He had no idea why he’d suggested it. He remembered something Rhodey had told him, then. Something that he’d used as an excuse.

“Well… See, hugs are, like, scientifically proven to be, uh, healthy.” He swallowed and tried to give a little smile, “You’re supposed to have, like, five a day, or something…”

Rogers looked almost like he wanted to run. But, the more Tony considered it, he really looked like he needed a hug, too. He seemed scared. Scared and sad were not good together. Tony knew that first hand. And he knew, in the back of his mind, that he was most of the reason Rogers was acting this way.

“You know what…”

He gave up trying to convince Rogers and just wrapped his arms around his middle, rested his chin on his shoulder, and prayed that Rogers wouldn’t punch him or something.

The blond’s whole body went rigid for a minute, and Tony braced himself to be thrown across the room into a wall. But that never happened. Slowly, Rogers started to relax. Tony felt the man’s chest heave as he took a deep breath and released it. The muscles in his shoulders and back seemed to release and relax with it. His arms started to wrap tentatively around Tony as well. It was stiff for a few moments, and then Rogers was really hugging him.

Like…

_ Really _ hugging him.

And he suddenly wasn’t Rogers anymore. Or Cap. Tony didn’t know the man who was clinging to him. He didn’t know whose forehead had dropped to his shoulder, and he didn’t know who it was that was trembling under him, fine shivers running down the spine under his hands. The arms holding him close and tight belonged to a stranger. Tony’s feet weren’t touching the floor anymore. He was pulled so close to the other man that he was actually being pulled up.

It only lasted about a minute longer before Steve set him down. This was Steve. He was sure, now. Not Rogers. Not Cap. This was Steve. And Tony didn’t know how to handle Steve.

Steve unwrapped his arms first, and Tony was quick to follow, if only to be able to pull back and see Steve’s face, see if Steve looked any different from Rogers.

Oh… Fuck…

Steve was the guy who had been sitting on the couch. The guy with the lost, sad eyes and the sagging shoulders. He was standing in front of Tony now, face slowly turning pink as he looked anywhere except Tony’s face. He looked small and scared. It made Tony frown, confused and even a bit concerned.

“Rogers-“

“Sorry,” Steve blurted, arms crossing over himself.

For a moment Tony thought Steve might say something else. But he could see tremors still working their way through the other’s shoulders. Steve’s eyes screwed shut a moment, as if he was trying to shut out some loud noise that only he could hear. Tony knew what that was like, and that wasn’t an expression that looked right on Steve’s face.

He reached out, to maybe give him a little comfort, “It’s oka-“

Steve flinched.

Tony pulled his arm back immediately, shocked. Steve’s eyes were open now, and locked onto Tony’s, wide and panicked.

“Steve-“

He cut himself when Steve’s eyes widened. What? What did he say?

He didn’t get a chance to say anything more. Steve was gone. He’d fled the room.

Tony blinked twice, and then was off like a shot. There was no way in hell he was just going to let that go. He fell behind Steve at some point, but JARVIS guided him the rest of the way. He found him in the gym. Steve wasn’t working out like Rogers usually did. Steve was in the locker room, in the shower area, his back in the corner and his knees pulled up to his chest. His forehead was pressed against the tops of his knees, and he was shivering.

Shivering and shuddering and… and crying.

Tony was careful as he approached. Steve flinched as the other man knelt in front of him, close enough to touch. Tony paid it no mind. He shuffled as close as he could, and then wrapped his arms around Steve, pulling him as tight to his chest as possible.

The shuddering and crying increased, but he didn’t care. He held tight, and murmured soft things to him. This wasn’t something that he’d ever thought he’d see. But he didn’t have time to feel shock right now. Something had made Rogers snap, and now Tony needed to figure how to help build Steve back up. He couldn’t leave him on the floor of the gym showers.

Tony couldn’t tell how long he’d sat there with Steve, holding the younger man and trying to comfort and calm him. Eventually, the sobs died off and Steve was only shivering in Tony’s arms, leaning heavily against him. Tony didn’t mind. He pulled a hand up to start gently petting Steve’s hair. It made the man shudder, but he relaxed against Tony after that.

It was another indiscernible amount of time before Steve pulled away, slowly. Tony let him, since he didn’t seem like he was about to bolt.

Steve flopped back into the corner and pulled his knees back up to his chest, resting his forearms on them. He stared at Tony a moment, eyes still sad, but less heavy. He looked more curious now than anything, even with an embarrassed blush covering his cheeks. They just stared at each other for a few moments, but it was Steve who broke the silence, clearing his throat and looking away.

“I… I’m sorry, Tony, I didn’t mean to… to get in your way, or anything…”

And he looked so young, then. So unsure of whatever he was supposed to be doing and Tony couldn’t help himself. He reached out, gently cupping the side of Steve’s head and forcing him to look back up.

“You didn’t. I just… couldn’t leave well enough alone.” He looked over the tear-tracks on Steve’s cheeks. “Though maybe it’s a good thing. Are you…? D’you feel any better?”

Steve had to consider the question a moment, and Tony was just quiet, letting him think.

“Yeah,” he answered, eventually, ducking his head again. “A little.”

Tony nodded, running his fingers through Steve’s hair. He seemed to relax at that.

“I’m sorry I yelled at you yesterday. I just… I overreacted, and you… you’ve obviously been upset. I didn’t think it would, y’know, be too big a deal.” He swallowed. “Wanna talk about it?”

Steve shook his head – only slightly, though, like was trying not to disturb Tony’s petting. That made the older man smile just a bit.

“I’m alright Tony, I just… I know, I just broke down a little, but… I’ll be alright. Honest.”

Tony pursed his lips together and stared Steve down for a moment, but the guy was calming down and turning back into Rogers by the second. So, he just sighed and leaned over to pull him into another, shorter, hug.

“Alright. But from now on, you can talk to me, alright? Anything you need.”

Steve was smiling a little and he hugged back. “Thank you, Tony,” he answered, softly.

Nodding, Tony pulled back and helped Steve up.

Steve’s shoulders were straighter, and his brow was carefully smoothing out. And Tony was afraid he’d slip back into Rogers. But his smile stayed, and his back wasn’t so tense. Tony counted it as a win.

They walked out of the gym together, but split when they got to the common floor, Tony staying in the elevator to go back down to his lab. Steve gave him a small wave and moved towards the kitchen.

~

A few weeks later, Tony was hunkered down in the lab, fixing his suit after a long battle. He heard the swish of the lab door opening, but didn’t turn, too focused on the mechanics under his hands. 

“Tony?”

He immediately stopped his work and turned to look.

“Hey, Steve. What’s up?”

The blond was standing awkwardly in the doorway, eyes sad and scared again. Tony turned more fully, waiting for the man’s answer.

“Um… is it okay if we… if we talk?”

Tony couldn’t help his smile, just glad that Steve was taking his offer seriously. He opened his arms wide, offering a hug.

“Of course it’s okay.”

Relief flooded Steve’s expression and he was across the room in an instant, accepting Tony’s hug and squeezing him back tightly. Tony held him close, still smiling softly.

"It'll always be okay, Steve."


	2. Cuddles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve learns there are people besides Tony that care about his well being.

Tony was gone for the week. Normally this wouldn’t have bothered Steve. But since their day at home together, Steve had started going to see the other man whenever he needed to talk – or needed a hug. More often, they just hugged, since it was hard for Steve to be forthcoming with information about his past life, even when talking about his problems. Tony didn’t much like hearing about Howard anyways, so it worked out.

But Tony was on a business trip, and Steve had been in need of a hug, really, since before Tony had gone. He was still nervous about going to Tony, sometimes, to hug or to talk or otherwise. So, he often waited until he was almost breaking down to go see him. It was a work in progress. Now, though, it didn’t matter, because Tony was gone.

Steve’s skin had been crawling for days now, and he didn’t know how to fix it on his own. He couldn’t sleep, he was hardly eating – which wasn’t helping, he knew. He couldn’t even make himself go down to the gym to work off the excess energy. He tried curling up under a mound of blankets, trying to simulate a hug. It didn’t help; just made him feel hot. It was like being smothered. He had to take a cold shower to be able to breathe again. 

There wasn’t anything he could do for himself, and that was probably the most frustrating thing. No one else was home, either. Natasha was taking a vacation, Thor was out with Jane, and Clint was with his family. Bruce was working with Dr. Pym on a project. They had retreated to Bruce’s lab earlier in the week and been down there ever since, leaving Steve all alone.

He found himself wandering the - nearly - empty Tower, just trying to keep from being still; from letting his mind focus on his problem. Tony would be home soon, and Steve could go talk to him. Soon. Yeah, he’d be okay soon. Soon.

Soon.

He froze when he entered the common room. No one else had been up here. Except… Thor was sitting on the couch. When had he gotten in? Why hadn’t JARVIS said anything? Steve tried to pull himself together before Thor noticed him. But the Asgardian turned around before he could. His smile fell as he looked Steve over.

“Captain, is something amiss?” Thor asked, standing.

Steve swallowed hard and began to back away, “N-No. Everything’s alright, just… Don’t worry about it.”

But Thor didn’t sit down. He took cautious steps closer. “Captain, I ask that you tell me the truth. You cannot help yourself hiding behind lies.”

Steve shrugged and ducked his head, “I’m fine… I’ll be okay, eventually. Don’t… Don’t worry about it.”

Thor wasn’t having any of it. “What has brought this on? I have never seen you like this before.”

And Steve could only shrug again at that, trying to keep himself from fidgeting under Thor’s gaze.

“Is it the absence of our friend Tony? You seem to spend a good amount of time together.” At Steve’s silence, he continued. “He will return soon.”

“Soon,” Steve whispered to himself.

_ Soon _ .

“Steve.” Thor’s voice was low, concerned. “You’re shaking.”

He took a step back, “I…”

Thor set a hand on Steve’s shoulder, “Don’t hide from me. Please.” He pulled the smaller man closer, wrapping his arms around him.

It was terrifying. Terrifying, but comforting at the same time. Steve didn’t know how to react.

After a few moments of odd silence, Steve started to hug back. It was cautious at first, and then he was clinging to Thor like a lifeline. The Asgardian didn’t say anything, just lifted Steve up and carried him to the couch. He sat in the corner, cradling the slighter man in his lap. He pulled a couple blankets around them and ran his fingers through Steve’s hair to try and comfort him.

“Can you tell me what’s wrong?” Thor asked, softly.

Steve shook his head, trembling and curling closer, just in need of contact. Thor didn’t ask again, simply continuing to hold him. At some point, he asked JARVIS to put on a movie, but Steve wasn’t paying attention. He stayed curled up in Thor’s arms as long as he was allowed – which turned out to be a long time. He’d fallen asleep at some point, though he couldn’t have said when.

~

A hand was running through his hair, though it was smaller than Thor’s, and the calluses were different. Steve opened his eyes a little and looked up.

“Tony…” he whispered.

Tony and Thor both smiled, chuckling softly.

“Yeah, bud, I’m home.” He smiled and gently brushed his thumb over Steve’s cheek. “Looks like I didn’t need to hurry, though. You’ve got a nice little cuddle-fest goin’ on.”

Steve frowned a little as Tony’s hand retreated, reaching out again to grab it. “Join us,” he murmured, not wanting him to leave.

Tony looked to Thor, whom Steve felt nod, and then nodded himself. “Sure.”

Steve smiled as Tony settled next to Thor, throwing an arm over Steve as he half-spooned up behind him. Thor adjusted the blanket over all three of them, and Steve felt himself slipping back to sleep, warm and surrounded by the arms of people he cared about.

Before he was all the way gone, he heard the elevator doors open, and Natasha’s voice carried through the haze in his mind.

“Am I missing out on something?”

Steve smiled as he finally drifted off.


	3. Snuggles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha has taken notice of Steve's patterns.

Natasha had become curious. After she’d walked in on Steve sandwiched between Thor and Tony on the couch, Tony telling her to hush instead of explaining everything to her, she’d started paying more attention to Steve’s moods. She had also left a couple tacks in strategic places to get Tony back for his rude way of welcoming her home.  
  
She had started to notice things.  
  
Steve would make it through a few missions, or one or two especially rough ones, before he would start to become constantly tense. He never seemed to realize it, though. After that, it depended on who was around. If Tony was gone on a trip, Steve would hold it in until Thor passed by and lifted him up, carrying him over to the couch to wrap him up in a blanket or two and hug him.  Sometimes she was allowed to join. It was fun to find out that gently scratching his scalp with her nails seemed to almost make him purr.  
  
Though, thankfully, it never got to that point when Tony was home. When he knew it was getting bad, Steve would disappear into the lab for a few hours in the evening. Eventually, he would reappear, looking calmer, and would go to bed. Times like those were the few where he managed to sleep through the night.  
  
Lately, the Avengers’ schedule had been crazier than normal. Natasha and Clint had been on several missions; Tony had to deal with a hundred different issues at Stark Industries plants all over the world. Thor had been called home, and Bruce had gone back into hiding for a while after General Ross had been elected to Secretary of State.  
  
Steve and Sam were still searching for Bucky all over the world, on top of the regular SHIELD sanctioned missions that they were needed for.  Sam had finally had enough and called a time-out, taking time off to visit his family. Steve’s usual cuddle partners weren’t home, so he was taking up more and more missions.  
  
Natasha was on a break, herself. She was sitting on the couch with Clint, enjoying a box of Twinkies when the elevator opened. She looked over, surprised that anyone was coming home this early in the afternoon. Her surprise turned to worry as Steve practically stumbled into the room. He frowned as he looked around, and then grumbled, dragging himself back into the elevator.  
  
“JARVIS?” Natasha asked.  
  
“Captain Rogers pressed the wrong button in the lift, Miss Romanoff. He is currently headed up to his floor.”  
  
Natasha heard Clint hiss and mutter, “That guy’s runnin’ himself ragged…”  
  
“Yeah…” she said, still frowning at the elevator doors. “Come on. We’re gonna follow him up.”  
  
“What? Why?’  
  
“Because I know what he needs. Come on.”  
  
She dragged Clint up off the couch and over to the elevator, still holding the box of Twinkies. They took it up to Steve’s floor and went to wait on his couch, hearing his shower running. It took nearly an hour, but they finally heard the water turn off, and the door opened only a few minutes later. Steve shuffled into the kitchen and pulled a water bottle from his fridge before turning around and noticing his teammates on his couch.  
  
He stared at them for a few minutes, as if he wasn’t quite sure they were really there.  
  
When he didn’t say anything, Natasha stood and walked over, uncapping the water bottle he was holding.  
  
“Drink it.”  
  
Steve swallowed and then lifted the bottle to his lips, drinking down the bottle in only a couple of gulps. Natasha took the bottle from him and tossed it into his recycle before taking his hand and dragging him over to the couch. Clint sat up in the corner of the sofa, one leg propped up along the back and the other foot on the floor. Natasha guided Steve to sit and lean back against him. Immediately, his eyes started to droop. She patted his cheek to get him to look up at her.  
  
“You need to eat first, Steve. Here.” She unwrapped a Twinkie and pressed it to lips. He took small bites until it was all gone and he was nearly asleep.  
  
Natasha set the box aside and wrapped a blanket around behind Clint’s back before laying another over Steve. She snuggled up close to him and pulled a blanket over herself, wrapping her arms around him.  
  
Steve frowned a little and shook his head, “Natasha… You don’t-”  
  
“Shut up and snuggle with us. You need it. I know you do.” She nuzzled closer, her head resting on his chest, and made herself quickly fall asleep. She knew he wouldn’t dare move her.  
  
Steve looked helplessly up at Clint, who simply shrugged. He guided Steve’s head down to rest on his shoulder and started to gently comb his fingers through the younger man’s hair, making him shiver.  
  
“At ease,” Clint murmured. “Rest, soldier.”  
  
Steve’s breath shuddered out of him and he closed his eyes, hiding his face against Clint’s neck as he slowly let himself relax and fall asleep.  
  
Clint didn’t sleep, keeping his arms tight around Steve; making sure he was kept close and safe.


	4. Spooning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve tends to not sleep for a few days after getting a bad nightmare. Tony decides he's going to try and help him out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I will do a Bruce chapter next, but y'all mentioned wanting some more Tony, and I'm happy to oblige.

It would be terribly hypocritical of Tony to confront Steve, or argue with him about going to bed and getting a full night of sleep. But after this, maybe he can also call Steve out for hypocrisy when he yells at Tony for his lack of sleep. 

Of course, that probably wasn’t the best thing to be focusing right then.

Tony, already wearing his pajamas, took the elevator down to the gym, peeking in to see Steve in the ring, sparring with Thor, just like he’d done the last couple of nights. He was starting to do very well against the Asgardian, Tony could admit. But even as Thor was finished, both of them climbing out of the ring, Steve was preparing to do some work with the punching bags. Thor patted Tony’s shoulder as he passed by, and Tony gave him a quick smile. They’d been discussing this for a while. Thor was going to be outside the door in case Steve wouldn’t come quietly.

“Hey, Cap. Steve. Buddy.”

Steve glanced over at him and then started with the bags. “Hi, Tony. What’s up?” 

Tony crossed his arms and stood straight, trying to seem authoritative. “You need to go to bed.”

“Right,” Steve huffed, laughing just a little and continuing with his workout. “I’m alright, Tony.”

“This is the third night in a row, Steve. You need sleep.”

Steve turned a little to give him a small glare, “Tony, I’m fine. I don’t need as much sleep as you do.” He turned back to the bag and continued his routine. “I can go a few days without sleep.”

“Yeah, well, so could I, but-” He stopped himself, looking at the tense lines of Steve’s back. He knew it wasn’t from their words. They bickered all the time, still. It never got under their skin anymore. 

Tony approached carefully and set a gentle hand on Steve’s back. The man’s rhythm stuttered and stopped as he shuddered under the touch. 

“Tony,” he said, softly. “Please, I just need this right now…”

The older man raised an eyebrow, not unkindly, “Kid, you and I both know that’s a lie.” He slid his hand up to firmly grip the back of Steve’s neck instead, watching his shoulders relax at the pressure. “Steve, c’mon.”

Steve whimpered softly, and shook his head, closing his eyes. “I can’t, Tony.”

His jaw was clenching and Tony couldn’t bear to see him like that. He took hold of his hand and started to lead him out of the gym, admittedly surprised at how easy Steve started to follow. “It’s alright, big guy.  I’ll help you out.”

Steve sighed, stopping a moment, “Tony, it’s not really-”

“It’s nightmares, right?” He smirked a little, sadly, at Steve’s surprised expression, which just seemed to confirm his guess. “Trust me, I’ve got some experience there.”

Steve ducked his head and nodded a little, following Tony out of the gym. He frowned when he saw Thor, but didn’t have time to think much on it as Tony pulled him into the elevator. He  was quiet as Tony pressed the button for Steve’s floor. He frowned a little. 

“Tony… Not that… Not that I don’t appreciate your help, but… you know I’m not a kid, right? I can take care of myself.”

Tony smiled up at Steve, amused. “I know you’re not a kid Steve. But you’re obviously not doing the best job of taking care of yourself, alright? Just let me do this for you. Okay?”

An embarrassed blush dusted Steve’s cheeks and he nodded, taking a deep breath. “Okay.”

Tony pulled him out of the elevator when the doors opened to Steve’s floor. “Alright. Take a shower first. Warm, not too hot. It’ll help you relax. Take your time, alright?”

“A-Alright?” Steve answered, going to do as Tony said. 

Tony hurried around the apartment, then, getting Steve a fresh set of clothes and leaving it outside of his room, starting a pot of tea, and turning off most of the lights. He sighed and looked around. He’d known for a while that Steve didn’t really keep a lot, but this was just… depressing. Nothing on the walls, and hardly anything for any sort of decoration. The only things that stood out were the bookcases: one with three shelves in the living room and one with five shelves in the bedroom. There were sketch pads left in random places around the apartment, so that was nice, too. 

He heard the door to the bathroom open and then close, then more rustling inside the bathroom before it opened and the fan turned off, Steve walking out into the hallway. Tony smiled and quickly grabbed his hand, pulling him into the kitchen. 

“We’re gonna have some tea, okay?”

“Tony, you hate tea.”

He shrugged and poured two mugs. “Well, if I don’t drink mine, you can have it.”

Tony pressed the mug into Steve’s hands and sat down next to him so that their shoulders were brushing. Steve drank his tea slowly, but he drank all of it eventually. Tony did his best to finish his mug, taking large mouthfuls to hopefully get more of it down quicker. Something about that made Steve smile, and, at least he was smiling, Tony thought. 

Once their tea was finished, Tony rinsed their mugs and pulled Steve into the bedroom. 

“Best help for a nightmare, that I know, is having someone next to you.”

Steve frowned. “You mean… you’re gonna sleep with me?”

“In a manner of speaking,” Tony said, nodding and giving Steve a wink. He laughed as Steve blushed and then gave his shoulder a gentle push. “Get in the bed, Steve.”

Steve just nodded and climbed in, actually looking just a little tired. He curled up on the right side of the bed, facing the inside. Tony shook his head as he got in the left side. 

“Roll over,” he ordered, softly. 

Steve hesitantly rolled over onto his other side, breath catching when he felt Tony curl up against his back, wrapping his arms around him. Steve had never spooned with anybody. Not even with Bucky back in Brooklyn. They’d slept chest-to-chest to conserve as much heat as possible. And if he’d spooned with anyone after that, he had been sure that he would be expected to be the - what was it? - big spoon. 

“T-Tony?”

“Creates a feeling of safety,” he murmured, already pretty drowsy. “Don’ worry ‘bout it, Steve. Relax and sleep, okay?”

“You sure this is okay?” he whispered. 

Tony huffed and poked his side. “Of course I’m sure. Sleep, Steve.”

Tony went silent after that, and Steve could feel his breaths level out. Steve swallowed and closed his eyes, focusing on relaxing. And, actually, it wasn’t too hard. Tony was warm against his back, and the room didn’t feel so big and empty with someone next to him. He smiled to himself, and just let himself drift, warm and feeling safe. He rested a hand over Tony’s, and he was asleep in no time, staying asleep through the night.


	5. Restrained

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hulk and Bruce have a turn to get in on the hugging action.

Steve had been on his way to go see Tony when the Avengers alert system went off. He took a deep breath before running to get his suit on. 

Doom Bots were flooding the city, and, honestly, Steve was totally sick of this happening all the damn time. Why couldn’t Doom just realize that he was no match for the team and give it up already? He barked out orders with a ferocity that wasn’t normal for him. But he was feeling way more irritable than normal, and this was, well, irritating. Natasha was giving him concerned glances as she easily took apart the bots coming at her. Tony probably was, but Steve couldn’t see through his faceplate. Even the Hulk seemed to be giving him a wide berth. 

The most frustrating thing, Steve decided, was that these bots were just… awful. They were easy to break, and they weren’t even inflicting much damage to the team or the city. Which wasn’t a problem, not really, but they just  _ kept coming _ . They were everywhere, swarming his team members and people in the streets. 

They needed to get people to stay inside while they took care of the bots, which took too long to communicate to the law enforcement officers that had also been called out. 

Hours. It took hours before the stream of new bots started to slow. By this time, Steve was simply irate, smashing bots; ripping them limb from limb. 

“Cap,” Tony said, tentatively, through the comms. “Hey, Cap, slow down. I know there’re a bunch, but you’re not lookin’ too hot.”

“Um, Stark, actually, I think he’s looking way too hot under the collar,” Clint butted in. 

“Shut up,” Steve growled. “I’m  _ fine _ .”

By the end of another hour, there were only a few bots standing, and Steve went to town, demolishing them. Tony landed just a few feet away, but had to back up and join Clint and Natasha to avoid flying robot parts. Thor tried to approach him. 

“Steve. The robot is dismantled. Please-” He stopped as the robots arm flew past his head. He back away, not sure how to handle a fuming Captain America. 

“I am sick and fucking tired of these Doom Bots showing up every other  _ fucking  _ weekend,” Steve spat. He was turned away from them all, fists clenched at his sides and stance so tight that Tony wondered if he could pull a muscle that way. He was easily audible, though, through the comms. 

The Hulk came back around one of the street corners, done with all his smashing. He could see his team at the other end of the street, standing together - except for Cap, who suddenly spun around to face the rest of them. Hulk watched as Cap slammed his shield down on the ground, standing much too stiffly as he screamed something at the others. His gestures became bigger and more erratic and Hulk could see the flush on his face from here. The others looked helpless. 

Tin Man stepped forward, trying to placate Cap. That usually worked. Cap usually went to Tin Man. But he just kept yelling and backing away from Tin Man. Hulk grunted and started to come up behind them, as quietly as he could. He knew what Cap needed. He saw the others give it to him sometimes. 

Cap turned around as Hulk got closer, and shouted in surprise as Hulk picked him up and hugged him close, restraining him. Cap’s tiny fists beat against Hulk’s chest as he demanded to be put down. Hulk didn’t listen, holding him tight with one hand while lifting the other to rub his back with two big fingers. 

“Cap needs to relax,” he rumbled, able to feel Cap’s heart racing. 

Hulk used one finger to push Cap’s cowl off his head and gently pet his head. Slowly, slowly, Cap started to calm down, his heart slowing down. He was trembling in Hulk’s arms, and Hulk stopped petting him to cradle him close. Cap was hiding his face in his hands, shaking and curling close. Hulk looked up to his other teammates, who were all staring at them with wide eyes. 

Hulk grunted, “Cap upset. Cap needs hug.”

Tin Man nodded, “Uh… Yeah, big guy. That’s right.”

Hulk grunted again and started to walk back to the Tower, still carrying Cap. He took him up to puny Banner’s room. By that time, Cap had stopped shaking and was basically asleep. He laid Cap down on puny Banner’s bed and then shuffled away, listening to puny Banner’s plea to let him back out. 

Bruce stumbled over to his dresser, even as he changed back, quickly pulling on his flannel pajama bottoms and an old t-shirt. He moved back to the bed, where Steve lay, still trembling. He noticed, for the first time, the tear tracks that ran through the dirt on his cheeks. Steve’s head stayed bowed, his eyes closed. Bruce ran a gentle hand through Steve’s hair, and saw how he shuddered at the touch. 

Carefully, Bruce got off the bed and went into the bathroom, getting a washcloth damp. He came back quickly and started to gently clean off the younger man’s face and neck, even undoing the top part of his uniform to clean his chest and help him cool down. Tears had started down Steve's cheeks again, and Bruce simply wiped them away. 

“Steve, I need you to do just a couple things. Can you handle that?” Steve nodded, and Bruce continued. “Take off your boots and gloves, and the utility belt. Then, if you want, you can borrow some of my clothes from the bottom drawer. They’re all over-sized and should fit you. Okay?”

Steve nodded again, whispering, “Yes, Bruce.” 

Bruce nodded and ran his hand through Steve's hair again before standing and going into the bathroom to rinse out the cloth and give Steve the privacy he needed. He came back in once he heard the bed creak as Steve laid back down on it. He laid down next to him and let Steve curl up close, wrapping his arm around him and just petting his hair.

After a few minutes, as Bruce was almost dozing, Steve whispered, “Is this how tired you always feel after… after changing back?” Steve felt exhausted, now that he was no longer angry.

Bruce just nodded. “It takes a lot out of you. It takes a lot of restraint to control it, too.” 

Steve sniffled and ducked his head. “Sorry I hit you.”

Bruce shook his head. “I’m not hurt, Steve. Just… sleep, okay? You'll feel better.”

Steve nodded and let go, knowing he was safe here, that Bruce knew what was best for this.

The door opened a few minutes later, and Tony's head poked in. He met Bruce's eyes and gave a small smile.

“Hey. He okay?”

Bruce gave a small, tired, smile back. “Yeah. He will be.”

Tony came in, shutting the door behind himself and moving to sit on the other side of Bruce. He laid down next to them, also changed into something more comfortable and sighed, looking over at Steve. 

“He needs a break,” Tony murmured. “He’s getting too wound up too quickly, anymore.”

Bruce frowned a little and sighed, gently scratching Steve’s nape, making him nuzzle closer in his sleep. “I think we all need a break,” he muttered. 

When he looked back at Tony, the man was smiling. Bruce frowned deeper. “What?”

Tony just grinned at him, “I’ve got an idea.”


	6. Dogpile

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, one or two teammates just isn't enough.

Tony had hoped that, after Steve's blow up in the street, maybe they'd catch a break, get some time off to recharge and relax. But since when did he ever get what he wanted?

Fury had deemed the incident indecent and benched Steve for the next few missions. Steve had marched straight down to the man’s office to tell him exactly what he thought of that. They were in there for an hour and three-quarters, arguing about it. Tony had been waiting outside the door for the last half-hour of it or so, wanting to be there for Steve when he came back out.

The door opened after a few minutes of silence, and Steve stalked out. Except, Tony had to scratch that because it was _Rogers_ who stepped out of the room, jaw clenched tight with spine and shoulders painfully straight. He looked over at Tony, and then lowered his eyes, giving a slight smile and nod before heading down the hall. Tony peeked into Fury’s office, anger bubbling up in his own chest as the man looked calm as ever.

Rogers had already made it into the elevator by the time Tony caught up, and he had to throw his hand out to stop the doors from closing.

“Hey, Steve… You okay?” He knew the answer, but he wanted to hear it from Rogers.

“I’m fine.” Rogers didn’t even glance at Tony.

Tony frowned and reached out to touch Steve’s shoulder. “Hey. Don’t pull that with me.”

Rogers shrugged his hand off and huffed, “Pull what?”

Tony rolled eyes. “You know what. Steve-”

The elevator doors opened and Rogers was gone in an instant. Tony huffed and slumped against the elevator walls.

“Back to square one,” he muttered.

~

Natasha looked up from her book as Tony walked in. She stopped petting Clint’s hair from where his head was resting in her lap. “You look down, sport. What’s up?”

Tony huffed and flopped dramatically next to her on the couch. “Kid, that man is gonna be the death of me.”

She set her book aside. “Steve? What’d he do?”

“Argued with Fury, came out all angry and tense, wouldn’t talk to me…”

Natasha sighed and shook her head. “He needs a hug.”

“He needs, like, a million hugs.”

Clint reached over and pinched Tony’s thigh, making him jump and smack Clint’s hand. “Hey, aw, no, don’t hit. What if we just all, like, dog pile on top of Steve? You talked to us about that before, after the thing with Hulk. And put on a movie? And order pizza?”

Natasha put a hand over his mouth to stop his rambling, then turned to look at Tony. “It’s not a bad idea, actually. Do you think you could coax Steve down here?”

“Rogers? I dunno. He might listen better to you.”

She huffed. “Fine. But you two have to get Thor and Bruce on board.”

Tony smiled, “Not a problem. I’ll talk to Bruce.”

Natasha smirked and looked down at Clint, who was pouting, arms crossed as he waited for her to move her hand. She did. “Have something to say?”

Clint was still pouting. “I was gonna call talking to Bruce.”

Tony stood, already heading for the labs. “Snooze you lose.”

“Natasha’s hand was on my mouth!”

“And whose fault was that?”

Clint got up to chase him, but Natasha pulling him back down onto the couch. “Chill out. It’s probably better this way.”

He pouted, but nodded. “Fine. Where’s Thor at right now?”

She shrugged, picking up her book again. “I dunno.”

Clint rolled his eyes and headed off to the elevator

~

“Brucie Bear,” Tony singsonged, bursting into the lab, “I've got a proposition for you!”

“I won't sleep with you, Tony.”

Tony rolled his eyes and gave Bruce’s side a poke. “Not that kind of proposition. We’re gonna hug Steve tonight.”

Bruce stopped his work and looked up. “I’m sorry, I'm sure you didn't mean for it to sound so sinister, but: What?”

Tony leaned against the lab table. “We're going to order pizza, put in a movie, and cuddle the shit out of Steve. He needs it.”

Bruce sighed and shook his head a little, taking off his glasses and pinching the bridge of his nose. “Tony, I dunno… He’s been pretty angry lately-”

“And that's exactly why we need to do this. C’mon, Bruce. Remember how he melted after his blowup in the street?” Bruce nodded, reluctantly, and Tony gripped his shoulders, “He needs that, now. Times, like, a hundred. But there's only five of us. We need you, man.”

Bruce looked over at his screens, and then his files, and then back at Tony. “Alright. What time?”

Tony grinned and kissed his cheek, gleefully, before starting to jog backwards out of the room. “I'll call you, alright?”

“Alright!” he heard Bruce call after him as he jogged towards the elevator.

~

Clint poked his head into Thor’s room. It was much bigger than the outside would lead you to believe. Far more Asgardian.

“Thor?” he called out, voice echoing around the space. “You in here?”

“I am, friend Clint.”

Clint jumped as Thor seemed to materialize beside him. “Jesus! What the hell, man? How do you do that?”

Thor shrugged, a little apologetically. “A millennium of training. What is it you need, Clint?”

“Um… We’re gonna dogpile on Steve tonight. He needs to chill out, so we're doing that and ordering a pizza. You in?”

Thor smiled, “I am in. Anything to help Steve become comfortable again here at home.”

Clint grinned, “Great!” He gave Thor a friendly punch on the shoulder, hissing as it bruised his knuckles slightly. “Ow… Well, um, come down soon, I guess. Dinner time, I think.”

Thor nodded, patting Clint’s back once and jostling him more than he was prepared for. “I will see you then.”

“Yeah… See you, man.”

Clint headed out of the room, stretching out his back and shoulders.

~

Natasha headed up to Rogers’ room as Clint and Tony got movies lined up in JARVIS’ system. They were arguing about something while Bruce set out the pizza and fended off Thor’s hungry, wandering fingers.

Rogers didn't answer the door right away, though. It took several minutes before Natasha heard footsteps in the living space behind the door. But they weren't coming any closer. She knocked again.

And then again after another minute.

“Go away.”

“Steve, it's Natasha. Open the door.”

The footsteps came closer, but he didn't open the door.

“What is it?”

“We need you down in the common room. ASAP.”

Rogers was silent for several moments, and then she heard him sigh. “I’ll be down.”

She smirked, “Alright. Hurry.”

Natasha turned and headed back down to the common room, where she found Clint and Tony wrestling for the remote while Thor watched and Bruce ignored them, putting together some punch in the kitchen. She snatched the remote from Clint and queued up a couple more movies before sitting down in front of the couch. Clint pouted at her, but she just raised and eyebrow, daring him to try and take it.

He didn’t.

Tony and Clint settled on either side of her as Rogers walked in. He stared at Natasha for a moment, to convey his sense of betrayal, and then turned to leave. He didn’t get very far.

Thor scooped Rogers up, making him gasp. “Hey… Hey! Thor, put me down.”

“No, Steven.”

Natasha got up, making Clint and Tony pout, and let Thor take her place. He turned Rogers around and forced him to sit on the floor between his legs, hugging him close to his chest.

Rogers’ jaw clenched and he tried to pull away. “Guys, stop-”

Natasha sat right between Rogers’ legs, leaning back against him. He immediately froze. He didn’t dare displace Natasha. She reached to pull his legs around and up into her lap, gently removing his shoes and tossing them aside before starting to rub his ankles. Rogers groaned softly.

Clint reached over to take hold of Roger’s right hand, and Tony took his left. They both pressed close pulling blankets over the group. Bruce brought the food closer, within everyone’s reach, and then settled on the couch behind Thor, laying on his side so that he could reach around and gently pet Rogers’ hair.

JARVIS started the first movie, The Fellowship of the Ring, and dimmed the lights. Rogers was tense through most of it, frowning as he watched. Frodo had to run from the Uruk-hai, there near the end, and offered the Ring to Aragorn.

“I would have gone with you to the end; to the very fires of Mordor.”

Clint and Tony squeezed his hands at the same time, and Thor hugged him just a bit tighter. Bruce’s hand gave his shoulder a squeeze, and Natasha’s hands started massaging his ankles again, which they hadn’t been doing since the Council scene. He suddenly felt very not alone, and very cared for, and very choked up.

Tears slipped silently down his cheeks. Rogers closed his eyes, and tried to swallow past the lump in his throat. Instead, Steve choked, and a sob escaped.

Natasha was the first to turn, hugging him tightly. Tony and Clint were quick to follow, hugging close and tipping the lump of them into a pile on the floor.

“Dog pile on Steve!” Clint whispered, making Steve laugh - or sob, it was a close thing.

Bruce came down from the couch a little more slowly, moving to lay further up, closer to Steve’s head where he could still pet his hair. They all laid there, in their dog pile, for several minutes as Steve calmed down again. Natasha kissed his cheeks and wiped away tear tracks.

“Hey there, big guy. Better?”

Steve sniffled and nodded, looking around as the faces of his team surrounded him. His eyes landed on Tony and he sighed, smiling wetly. “You did this?”

Tony smirked and ruffled Steve’s hair gently, “You bet I did. Wasn’t gonna just let you get away that easy.”

Steve shook his head and just reached out to hug as many of them as he could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a fun tidbit: As I was working through this, every time I thought about the title for the chapter, all I heard was Bugs Bunny in my ear going, "Dogpile on the rabbit! Dogpile on the rabbit!". If you haven't seen that cartoon, I recommend looking it up!


	7. Bro-Hugs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve finds someone he can connect to a little more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A special thanks to firstar28 for the inspiration for this chapter (and the next!).

The kid was interesting, Steve would give him that. When Tony introduced Peter to the rest of them, Steve had been more removed than maybe he should have. Admittedly, he had felt that, maybe, the kid would start to take more of the team’s attention. Which was nuts, of course. Tony was always available for Steve, and the others were always at least patting him on the back or hugging him quickly in the hallways when things got too hectic around. Natasha especially, since they had decided it would be best for her to train Peter. 

And it was odd - well, no so much, Steve supposed - when Peter started doing the same thing. 

At first, it was only in passing, when Peter was running to meet Natasha in the gym, or Tony or Bruce in the labs. 

“Hey, Cap!” or, “Hey, Steve!” and a thump on the back or a pat on the arm. 

And then it became more regular. During the summer, Peter stayed in the Tower with them, so he passed Steve in the kitchen in the mornings, patting his back as a hello or just setting a hand on his shoulder to let him know he was there as he reached around him. After a bit, he would sit next to Steve, letting their knees bump under the table.

Steve would’ve been lying if he had said he minded it all, but it had taken him by surprise how touchy the kid had been right out if the gate.

Tony assured him it was a good thing. Steve was willing to believe him.

Fury was still reluctant to send Steve on long missions, and he was sure that Natasha or Clint was influencing his decisions. But it was alright, he supposed. Of course, it meant that he spent a lot more time around Peter when the rest of the team had missions and things. It wasn't so bad. But the kid asked a lot of questions.

“So you're from Brooklyn, right?”

~

“What was it like when you found out the Dodgers moved?”

~

“Do you have a girlfriend yet? Lots of girls at my school talk about you. Is it different with adult women?”

“Or, I mean, I don't want to assume anything. So… A boyfriend maybe?”

~

“Do you have a favorite team member? I won't tell.”

“Is it Mr. Stark? Or Nat? She's pretty cool.”

~

“Hey, Cap, Steve,” Peter had started to just use those both in succession, “like, how old are you?”

Steve hadn't had much issue answering Peter's other questions, even if the boyfriend one had thrown him for a loop. But he had to think for a moment about this one. And then he looked at Peter, frowning slightly and considering how close they were in age compared to everyone else.

“I’m… twenty-three. I’ll be twenty-four in July…”

“Aw, that's neat. I'll be 18 in August. You know, I always thought-” Peter cut himself off, but Steve hadn’t quite been listening. 

Twenty-four. He was going to be… only twenty-four. He leaned back against the counter, staring down at the floor and trying not to feel so, so much older. 

Peter’s face was suddenly in his vision, concerned, and his hands were on Steve’s shoulders. His lips moved, but it was a few moments before Steve registered what he was saying. 

“-eathe. Breathe, Cap. Steve, c’mon. In. Out. With me.” 

Peter took a couple deep breaths, and, somehow, Steve managed to breathe with him after just a few tries. The smile that Peter gave him was startling, but comforting. As was the hug he was pulled into. 

It wasn’t like the hugs Tony or the others gave him. Peter clasped his hand, not quite like a handshake, and pulled him close, tight, with his other arm. Steve did the same, holding tight, tethering himself to something real for a minute. When he finally pulled back, he was frowning slightly, but for a new reason. 

“What… was that?”

“A panic attack,” Peter said, soothing as ever. “But you’re alright now. I got’chu.”

“N-No, I know, I meant…” he took Peter’s hand, the way Peter had done leading into the hug, “this.”

Peter stared at their hands for a moment, and then laughed, good-naturedly. “It’s called a bro-hug. Or, Ned and I call it that. It’s how we hug our friends… But, um, I wasn’t sure if you’d be okay with both arms around you… Some people freak out. I just wanted to be safe-”

“Thank you,” Steve said, softly. The corner of his mouth ticked up, “I think I like it.”

Peter grinned widely, “Awesome!”

From that point on, Peter gave Steve bro-hugs  _ all the time _ . And Steve didn’t really mind, either. Peter didn’t give them to anyone else in the Tower. It was their thing, whether they were passing in the hall or finishing a long, tough battle. Clint often pouted, since neither Steve nor Peter would do it with him. Natasha sometimes rolled her eyes.

But Tony approved. And Tony still approved when it went a little further. 

Steve started going to hang out with Peter when he was feeling down or when his skin started to crawl. Peter would give him a bro-hug, longer than their usual ones, and then try to teach him the strategy behind Mario Kart - which Steve still didn’t quite have a hang on. But it was relaxing. 

Sometimes, depending on what was going on, it was better than if Steve had gone to Tony. 

Peter was so young, considering his superhero gig, and it was just easier to open up about some things to him. 

Once, they started a tournament after Steve had a nightmare. It started around midnight, and they’d both actually fallen back asleep before three o’clock. Steve always slept lightly after nightmares, so he was woken by the feeling of someone placing a blanket over him. He jerked awake, but a hand in his hair soothed him again. 

“Hey, it’s okay, Steve,” Tony murmured. Steve relaxed further at his voice. “Don’t wanna disturb your bro there.”

Steve looked and, for the first time, noticed Peter leaning against him, actually snoring softly. Steve smiled and looked back up at Tony. 

“Thanks,” he murmured. 

Tony gently cupped Steve’s cheek a moment. “Sleep well.”

“Y’too…” was all Steve managed before drifting back off. 


	8. Group Hug

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam learns about Steve's interesting coping method.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank everyone who commented on the last chapter. Seeing positives like that is what makes me want to continue this even more. I wanted to let you all know that I appreciate it so, so, so much, even if I don't always reply to everyone individually. Thank you! *blows kisses*

Since meeting Steve, life had gotten about a thousand times weirder than Sam had ever thought possible. So, really, he shouldn’t have been as surprised as he was. 

Steve was a veteran. Of World War II. Some of his behaviors Sam expected. Anxiety and depression were common in vets, and it was obvious, sometimes, how rough it was for Steve to battle with PTSD. Other times, it was subtle. 

He’d brush something off, or snap at someone. But that would be it, and they’d all move on. Other times, Steve would start getting twitchy and irritable. It always started off small, and Sam tried his best to be around, because that seemed to help ground Steve. But it always got worse. He’d get more twitchy or more snappy, and, sometimes, they had arguments that Sam never would have had with anyone about something so trivial it wasn’t even funny. 

Steve would realize what he’d done after the argument, and then run off to Tony or Bruce’s lab, or sometimes to Thor’s room. He’s find Sam hours later and apologize, which Sam appreciated, though he’d never really held it against Steve in the first place. 

They had returned from another search for Barnes just a few hours ago, and Steve was really not handling things well. Sam supposed it was understandable. They never seemed to get anywhere with any of it. Steve had snapped at Natasha, and had argued with Clint three times already. He was tense. So tense that Sam’s back was aching in sympathy. 

“Man…” Sam said, coming to sit by Steve on the couch, “I think this has gone on long enough. What do you need?”

Steve didn’t look at him. “I don’t  _ need  _ anything.”

“Alright. Then what do you want?”

“I don’t  _ want _ anything, either! I’m fine, let it alone.”

He stood to storm off, but Bruce was there, just behind the couch. He shook his head a little at Steve and simply pulled him into a hug. 

“You’re alright,” he murmured, rubbing the taller man’s back. Steve shuddered, and Sam thought he might yell, but he just relaxed, suddenly nearly boneless. Bruce held him up, hugging Steve just a little tighter as Steve clung to him. 

Sam was… confused, to say the least. He’d seen so many vets upset by touch like that, when they got the way Steve did, and hadn’t even considered it. Peter walked into the room, just a moment later and took in the scene, eyes wide. He was quick to rush over and also wrap his arms around Steve. 

Peter made eye contact with Sam, and waved him over. Sam wasn’t going to say no. He hugged Steve, too, though a little more hesitantly. Steve shivered under the three of them.

“Guys…”

“Shhh,” hushed Peter. “It’s a group hug.”

It lasted only a minute or two, Steve pulling back. “Thanks, guys. I’m… I’m okay now.”

Peter hummed and grabbed Steve’s hand. “C’mon. I just unlocked more car features on Mario Kart.”

Sam watched as Steve was dragged away, arms crossed and head cocked. He looked over at Bruce, who just shrugged. 

“Tony found it out a while ago. Sometimes he just needs a hug or several to calm down, or to be pulled out of a mood.”

Sam looked back at the door Steve and Peter had disappeared through. “I’d been… avoiding it. I thought he wouldn’t want that.”

Bruce shrugged, “Just… give it a shot next time. I think it means a lot to him.”

Sam nodded, looking thoughtful. “I will.”


	9. Clinging (on for dear life)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve takes a dunk and doesn't react well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry in advance if this is awful, I've been off my game lately.

Steve was knocked from the top of the Tower. Blown from the top, more like. He made an arc and another one of the bots grabbed him midair, fighting him before dropping him over the East River. 

Tony swore, inside his suit, and hit the thrusters. He was finished with his sector, and Thor and Hulk were demolishing the last few robots.

“JARVIS, get a mark on Steve.”

By the time he was over the river, his display had a mark. He dove quickly, finding Steve stunned and panicked in the water. He grabbed him quickly and flew quickly towards the Tower. Steve fought for a few moments, and then seemed to realize who was holding him. Suddenly, JARVIS was warning Tony that there was too much pressure on the joints of his suit. 

“Steve… honey, you’re holding too tight. Please let up-” Steve’s head shook frantically, and he just held tighter, so Tony stopped. “Alright. Okay, it’s okay.”

Steve’s grip lightened a little, and they made it back to the Tower just fine. Tony had to leave Steve in medical while he got changed, and he was met with much resistance from the blond, but, with help for Thor, he was finally able to sneak back to his room. 

He showered quickly and changed clothes. He moved out into his living room and was startled by a voice behind him. 

“You need to go see Steve.”

Tony spun around to face Natasha. “Shit! Stop that. Jesus, you scared me.”

She rolled her eyes. “Go see him. He’s in his room, and he’s freaking out. He’s not letting the rest of us near him.”

He frowned, “Shit.” He hurried for the elevator. Once he got to Steve’s floor, he rushed into the bedroom, finding the man curled up tight under the covers. “Oh, Steve…”

Steve’s head immediately whipped up and he sobbed once, “Tony…”

Tony hurried over and climbed into the bed with him, pulling him closer. Steve clung to him like a dying man, hiding his face against Tony’s chest and heaving deep breaths. Tony was careful to be gentle and calm, rubbing his back an petting his hair with one hand as he held him close and secure with his other arm. 

“Steve,” he murmured, after a few minutes, “I need you to breathe, honey. Breathe deep; slow down.”

Steve whimpered and shook his head, breaths still fast and ragged. Tony started to push him away, and Steve panicked, grappling to hold Tony closer. Somehow, Tony was able to hold him off, and simply cupped his cheeks, tipping his face up and forcing him to make eye contact. He brushed away the tears on Steve’s cheeks. 

“Breathe with me.”

Steve made an effort after that, focusing on breathing with Tony, eyes flicking between Tony’s eyes and the arc reactor, watching his chest move. Tony kept gently petting his hair, murmuring assurances and praise. After several minutes, Steve seemed to finally be calming down. He wouldn’t meet Tony’s eyes, and seemed embarrassed. 

“‘M sorry… I didn’ mean’a-”

“Stop.” Steve’s eyes flicked up. Tony continued, “It’s okay, Steve. I told you, you can always count on me, okay?

Steve sniffled and nodded, wrapping his arms back around Tony and clinging tightly to him. “Okay,” he whispered. 

Tony just let him cling, and held him back, waiting for the fine trembles in his shoulders to subside as he eventually just cried himself to sleep. Tony kissed Steve’s forehead. 

“I’ve got you, Stevie. You’re safe.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, quick question, does anyone think it could eventually work for Steve and Tony to further their relationship romantically? I want to know what you guys think, because I feel like maybe I'm toeing the line, and I don't want to cross it if it would be weird.
> 
> EDIT: Okay, y'all decided it would be weird, so we'll stay away from that. Thank you!


	10. Hand Holding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky comes back into the picture.

Steve hadn’t expected it to go well. At this point, he never did expect things to go well. 

He just hadn’t expected it to be this awful, either. 

Bucky - James, he’d insisted - was now in Avengers custody, and almost everyone else was in medical. Natasha had walked away with nothing more than bruises, Tony and Clint had broken limbs, Thor was getting a slash bandaged, and Sam was being held overnight for head injuries. Steve had bruises and cuts, and wounded pride. Peter had walked away unscathed, James backing off after realized that Peter was a kid.

So it was Peter who bopped over to where Steve was sulking on the couch and gently hugged him from behind. “Hey, Steve.”

He sighed, “Hey, Pete.” He reached up to pat his arms, crossed over Steve’s chest. 

“Are you okay?”

Steve smiled just a little. “I will be.”

Peter hummed, still holding on. “You think Mr. Barnes will be okay?”

Steve was silent for a few minutes. He couldn’t definitively answer that question. “I hope so.”

Peter hugged him just a bit tighter, holding on for a while longer. 

~

James didn’t like to be touched, they found. 

When they were finally allowed to get him settled in the Tower, Steve showed him to the guest room on his floor. Tony and Natasha had gone, too, just in case. James had turned to Steve, once the apartment tour had finished. 

“Thanks,” was all he’d said, but it was more than he’d said to Steve in over two weeks, and he just couldn’t help himself. 

Steve set a hand on his shoulder, intending to pull him into a small hug, but then found himself pinned to the wall, a knife pressed against his throat. Natasha was quick to interfere, and there was a scuffle before James managed to escape and lock himself in his room. Tony and Natasha had to force Steve to go down to medical, as the knife had ended up in his abdomen. 

He spent the rest of the day on the couch in the common room, under threat of disembowelment from Natasha (accompanied by a kiss to the cheek). Peter had hurried in later and set up his gaming system so they could play a few laps, and then fallen asleep with his head on Steve’s lap.

~

After a couple weeks, James started to come out of his room more. He didn’t talk much, but he was okay being around most of the team. Thor made him nervous, and he was afraid to hurt Peter, but he could be around the others. Steve noticed that he seemed to like Natasha the most. She was the first one to touch him. 

He was sitting in front of her favorite chair, since she was sitting in it. Sometimes, if Natasha wasn’t around, Steve would sit in it, too. It was the best vantage point in the room. Natasha had seen how tense James was, and reached down to gently run her fingers through his hair. James had tensed further, at first. 

“ Rasslabit'sya, soldat,” she had murmured, and he had obeyed. 

Natasha had been able to elaborately braid his hair before James had finally become too overwhelmed and ran off. 

It became a regular thing. Bucky would sit in front of Natasha’s chair when he became too nervous, and she would run her fingers through his hair or rub his shoulders until he was relaxed. 

Steve tried to gently touch his arm once, to get his attention, and his own arm was swiftly pinned behind his back until James realized what had happened and fled. Steve didn’t try again after that. He waited for James to initiate contact - which started with everyone else, first. He was even able to ruffle Peter’s hair, always quickly, and always backing off afterwards. Natasha was hugging him by this point, James needing it sometimes more than a gentle hand in his hair. 

Steve would be lying if he said it didn’t make him jealous. They lived on the same damn floor, for Pete’s sake. 

He sulked, bottling away the jealousy as best he could. It wouldn’t do anyone any good, after all. Least of all himself. Tony noticed first, and often pulled Steve aside, down to the lab or up to the penthouse, and just held him a while. Other times, it was Bruce, who James hardly paid attention to, but felt safer touching, because Bruce could probably do more damage to the Soldier than vice versa. Bruce would lead Steve away, help him calm down and distract him a while. 

Peter tried to help as well. He’d pulled Steve to his room, but instead of getting out the game controllers, he pulled out a deck of Uno cards and sat across from Steve on the floor, dealing them each a hand. 

“So… You’re grumpy lately.”

“I’m fine, Peter.”

“Fine my  _ ass _ ,” Peter grumbled as they started playing. “I know it’s about Mr. Barnes. You wanna talk about it?” 

“N-No.”

“That’s fine. We’ll just play cards.”

They played several rounds, and Steve won each one because, FUBAR or not, he was still a tactical genius. Peter was the one to call it quits. He climbed up onto his bed and then pulled Steve up, not letting go of his hand. 

“He does like touching people,” Peter murmured. “He’s just… afraid to sometimes.”

“I know he’s afraid,” Steve said, more harshly than he’d intended. 

Peter frowned, “Steve, look… I know it’s hard, okay? I know it freaks you out, too. But you can’t be afraid to try. I think that makes it worse for him.”

Steve looked over at him, frowning, confused. 

Peter sighed. “Nevermind, just… start simple, okay? Like… like this!”

He held up their entwined hands. 

~

Having James living in his apartment gave Steve some advantages, he supposed, and he started to use them. More and more he just started to show up wherever the other was. The kitchen, the living room, in and out of the office… it was all fair game. At first, James would leave. He was uncomfortable, rightly so, and fled as soon as he thought he was able. Steve understood.

He slowly became more and more used to Steve’s presence - in a closer proximity, that is. 

Steve sat, carefully, next to James on the couch, leaving a couple feet between them. He didn’t expect much of a reaction. Thought, he supposed he should’ve known better. It was James, after all, brainwashing be damned. 

“What are you doing?” James said, voice low and a little rough.

Steve’s head whipped around, and he stared at him for a moment. He was sure that, since they’d found him, James had never spoken that many words to him at once.

“Um… Sitting.”

“That’s not what I meant.”

Steve bit his lip, reaching out and setting his hand between them, “I’m doing my best to help you.”

James frowned, “Why?”

“Because I care about you. You’re my friend.”

He looked away, giving a sharp huff that might’ve been a laugh. “You don’t even know me.”

“I know some of you,” Steve insisted. “And… And even if I don’t know everything, you’re still important to me. I want to help you, Buck.”

James’ head snapped back around to glare at Steve, “And how do you think you’re going to do that.”

Steve took hold of James’ hand, lacing their fingers carefully together. “Like this. Being with you. Taking small steps. I know we’ll get there eventually.”

James stared at him for a few moments, and then looked away again. But he didn’t let go of Steve’s hand; even held it just a little tighter. 

Smiling, Steve picked up his book, balancing it on his lap as James continued to watch whatever was on the television. 

It was progress.


	11. Tucked In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve stumbles into his new teammates' space.

Having new people in the Tower was weird. Not that Scott and Hope weren’t nice. Because they were. Steve just wasn’t around enough anymore to really get used to their presence. Bucky was doing better on his own, and Steve had finally gotten back to a point of consistent emotional stability, so Fury had started sending him out on missions, catching up on the things he hadn’t been doing before. 

He knew that their floor was right above his, and they were nice. Quiet, too, for the most part. Scott was a neat guy. Hope was sensible, and Steve had liked the couple conversations he’d had with her. 

Now, though, Steve was expecting he’d see a little more of them. Mostly because he was exhausted, and he was definitely not accepting any missions for a while. 

Steve stumbled into the elevator, fumbling to press the button for his floor as he leaned against the wall. He closed his eyes, just resting for a minute until the doors opened. He trudged out into his living room, glad that he’d changed and showered at the SHIELD complex, because there was no was he was making it to his bathroom or the bedroom. He shuffled over to the couch, which seemed further away than normal - though that might’ve just been the dark and his fatigue - and flopped down, falling asleep almost immediately. 

He woke up only an hour or so later, a hand gently shaking his shoulder. It was small, feminine. He groaned and tried to pull away. 

“Nat… No, ‘m sleepin’...”

“Steve, please, wake up.”

That was not Natasha’s voice. He frowned and blinked his eyes open. Hope’s face was about a foot away from his own, and she looked concerned. He startled, jerking backwards. 

“What… What’s goin’ on?”

She frowned a little deeper, “Steve, this is Scott’s and my floor.”

He blinked at her, frowning back, “What? No… No I came up to my floor…”

He looked around the room, head slightly spinning. Oh. Oh, no. This… was not his living room. He looked around, trying to make sense of how he’d gotten there, and then noticed Scott standing a little behind Hope. And they were both in pajamas. 

He hadn’t made it to his own floor. He had fallen asleep on someone else’s couch. He didn’t even know them that well…

Hope’s hands were suddenly on his cheeks, and his eyes flicked up to meet hers. 

“Breathe, Steve. You’re okay.”

It took him a moment, but he sucked in a breath, and then nearly choked. Hope had the good sense to back away and let him catch his breath again. 

Scott had taken her spot, once Steve had started to breathe steadily again. He set a hand on Steve’s shoulder. 

“Hey, man. It’s okay.” He didn’t sound patronizing. And it was actually comforting. “You had a long few weeks. You’re just tired, right?”

Steve nodded, some voice in the back of his mind saying that Scott had a kid, so of course he was going to be comforting. He started to stand anyways. “R-Right… I’ll just…”

Hope stopped him, “I think it would be better if you didn’t. You’re already here. I think it would be better to just sleep. Okay? We just wanted to check on you.”

He swallowed hard, “B-But I… I mean…”

She shook her head and helped him lay back down, his head resting on Scott’s lap. He tensed up, but Scott just pet his hair, gently. Hope tucked a blanket over him and laid behind him. 

“Sleep, Steve. You’re okay here.”

Steve swallowed and relaxed, slowly falling asleep. 


	12. Caresses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve gets taken prisoner by Baron von Strucker as part of a deal with the Maximoff twins. Of course, it's not going to go the way the Baron expected.

At first, she was glad. Maybe it was bad to be so happy about it, but it was the first step towards their revenge. Pietro had been more reluctant to enjoy it, but he got there eventually. Hydra had promised the twins satisfaction, and, so far, their sacrifices had been worth it. 

But now, Wanda watched as they marched the Captain back to the interrogation block, and into a different room from before. This was, what, the third time she had watched this little procession? The Captain was slightly hunched, favoring his right side. The part of her that she thought would be gleeful at this curled away, and something sour started to roll around in the pit of her stomach. 

Wanda ignored it, forcing herself to smile over at Pietro. He smiled back, looking far less conflicted than she was starting to feel. 

Their rooms were on the other side of the base, and over the next few days, Wanda tended to stay there, no longer watching the march of the Captain to and from the interrogation block every day. Still, sometimes she imagined she could hear him screaming and sobbing. Pietro went out to watch every day, but seemed to be having the same realization that she was. 

Two weeks after they’d first brought the Captain in, Pietro didn’t go to the morning march. Wanda looked over at him and reached for his hands. 

“How is he?”

Pietro shook his head, “He heals fast. He looks the same every day. Some days, he is worse, but he looks… the same.”

She stared at him for a few moments, “You don’t like it.”

He met her eyes, “He looks like hell. He flinches at everything, now. That is the only difference.”

Wanda stood, letting go of his hands as her fists clenched. “I want…” Her nails dug into her palms. “I want to see him.”

Pietro was the one who went to Strucker, asking for permission to visit the Captain’s cell after his interrogation. The Baron was all too happy to let them. He even promised them total privacy, no cameras. And while that might’ve been ideal, Wanda knew she would still have to do some tampering with the camera systems. 

They didn’t go to the march that evening, waiting for one of the guards to alert them of the Captain’s placement. Wanda hurried through the halls, wanting to get to the Captain as soon as she could. Pietro blasted past her, making her huff, but she reached the room soon enough. The cell was kept locked by a heavy vault-like door. The guards unlocked the door and let the twins in. There was a small cot, standing about a foot off the ground, lumpy and dirty, and the Captain laid on top if it, back to the door. Wanda stepped in, and she saw him tremble, curling up tighter on himself. 

The door slammed shut behind them, and Wanda quickly focused on obscuring the cameras, just in case. 

“He is trembling,” Pietro murmured to her, and she turned quickly to look. 

Wanda frowned and moved closer. The Captain wasn’t bleeding from any major wounds today, but she could see the large bruises that were left visible on his face and neck. She wasn’t quite sure if his eyes were closed because they were swollen or if he just didn’t want to look. 

Wanda looked to Pietro one time, and then reached to gently run her fingers through the Captain’s hair. He flinched badly and put an arm up defensively. Wanda jumped back, and took a deep breath. 

“Captain… please, I am not… we are not here to hurt you.”

It took several tense minutes, but the Captain eventually lowered his arm. Wanda sat on the edge of the cot, petting his hair. He didn’t jerk away, but he couldn’t seem to stop trembling. Eventually she stood and looked up at Pietro. 

“I need your help.”

Together, they helped the Captain reposition, his head resting on Wanda’s lap where she could easily reach, petting his hair and gently, carefully, caressing his cheeks, neck, and shoulders. She used just a little of her magic to help him calm enough to stop shaking. Pietro took the Captain’s hands, brushing his thumbs over his knuckles and rubbing his wrists where there were bruises from shackles. 

The Captain did not speak to them that first time. Nor the second. But the third day, when Pietro called him Captain, the man whispered one soft syllable.

“Steve.”

Wanda kissed his forehead then, murmuring his name back to him. 

Visiting Steve became regular, Strucker believing that, even if they were being gentle, perhaps it could be used to pull information from him. The twins had nodded when he spoke to them about it, but they both knew that they would never be able to hurt Steve like that. 

Yet, they could still do no more than gently caress him, which was greatly disappointing. More and more Wanda just wanted to scoop him up and cradle him until it all went away. He was too beaten for that; in too much pain. Only once did Pietro suggest maybe just giving up answers so that maybe there would be a chance of Steve seeing his team again faster. Steve had reacted badly, and they never brought it up again. 

Wanda hated it. She wasn’t able to contact the Avengers, or she would in a heartbeat. Double-crossing Strucker after what he had done for them, with them, to them… it would be hell if he found out. 

Pietro brought her news one day, though, saying that he heard some of the officers talking about the Avengers. They were taking down Hydra bases all over Europe, looking for Steve, and also the sceptre that had helped Strucker give the twins their powers. Wanda had sighed in relief. Both of those were in this facility, and if they were able to track the energy in the sceptre, then they would find Steve faster.

She and Pietro told Steve when they returned. He cried, leaning into their caresses more than normal. Wanda had to help him sleep, using her magic to help him calm down. She stayed long after he was asleep, though, petting his hair and keeping him calm throughout the night. 

It was late the next morning when the base sirens started going off, and Wanda could only thank every deity that might be listening. She ran quickly to find Pietro, who simply scooped her up and dashed off to the interrogation block where Steve still was. Wanda was able to take down the guards and the people inside the room with Steve. They helped Steve into one of the corners and hunkered down with him. He was shivering and trying hard to take full breaths, so Wanda helped him, petting his hair and calming him with a little help from her magic.

Crashing could soon be heard alongside the sirens, and Wanda kept ahold of Steve’s mind so that he didn’t panic. Eventually there was a pounding at the door, and Wanda used her magic to open it. The Iron Man walked into the room, and the twins couldn’t help bristling. The Falcon was quick to follow, and Wanda could hear Russian cursing in the hall - a man and a woman in an argument about the man coming in to see Steve.

Wanda made eye contact with the Iron Man, Stark, and lifted her chin. 

“He is safe. Hurting, but safe. And I am not leaving his side.”

She released her magic hold on Steve and simply continued to pet his hair and cheeks. Pietro stood, a hand gently brushing over Steve’s shoulders as he did, and approached Stark, who’s faceplate lifted. They glared at each other for a moment, and then Pietro started to walk out of the room. 

“I know where the stretchers are. Follow.”

The Falcon followed, but Stark stayed where he was, staring at Wanda and Steve. It was another few moments before Steve’s head lifted and he made eye contact with Stark. The older man took a few steps closer and Wanda started to let go. Steve’s eyes immediately shifted to her. 

“Please, don’t.”

The room went still for several tense moments, and Wanda gently brushed her fingers through his hair, amazed as he relaxed into her caress. Stark moved back to the door, looking into the hallway and then jerking back as Pietro sped into the room with the Falcon and the stretcher. Stark and the other men helped Steve to lay down on it, and Wanda trailed behind them as Steve was wheeled out to the jet. 

The man who was speaking in Russian before swore again as they passed by him, and then ran deeper into the base, the woman running right after him 

Wanda helped Steve settle on the plane, watching as he relaxed. She started to pet his hair again, and he leaned into the touch, falling asleep soon after. Stark came to sit next to her, and cleared his throat. 

“Thank you for… helping him.”

Wanda took a deep breath, “He didn’t deserve what they were doing to him. He needed a kind touch.”

Stark just nodded again, watching Steve carefully. “Thank you.”


	13. Blanket Fort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve isn’t doing well after his time as Hydra’s prisoner, and Clint thinks he knows some people who can help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to GraceEliz for the inspiration for this chapter!

Even with Wanda’s help in the aftermath of his time as Hydra’s prisoner, Steve wasn’t recovering well. Tony tried to help, being around as much as he could possibly make himself available. Bruce and Thor tried as well, and Sam worked with Steve the ways that he was more familiar with. It wasn’t enough. 

Steve noticed Clint and Natasha whispering to each other sometimes, glancing over at him. He didn’t really know what it was about, but he tried not to worry about it too much. 

Until, of course, Clint woke him up one morning and tossed a couple of duffel bags at him. “Here. Pack for about two weeks. You’re going on vacation.”

Once Steve gained the power of speech, he frowned and sat up, “Clint, I can’t-”

“You can, and you are. Nat and I have already talked to everyone else. And Nat told me to call her if you gave me any trouble.” He was quiet for a moment and then put a hand on Steve’s shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. “Trust me.”

Steve looked up at him a moment, and then nodded. “Alright, give me… a half hour?”

Clint nodded. “That’s fine. Pack comfortable clothes. You’re not goin’ anywhere fancy.”

Steve frowned at that, but didn’t protest, simply packing two weeks worth of clothes, making sure they were reasonably comfortable. He found Clint waiting for him out in his living room, and the older man just led him down to the hangar and onto the Quinjet. Natasha was already there, waiting. She gave Steve a small smile as he got settled in and then helped Clint take off. 

The flight was only a couple of hours, but Steve was wired the whole time. He knew they were supposed to be taking him someplace safe, somewhere that he could relax. Still, he couldn’t shake off the anxiety of not knowing where he was going, or what he would find once he was there. By the time they’d touched down, he was completely stiff, staring at the hatch and waiting for it to open.

Natasha’s hand landed on his shoulder and he startled. She squeezed gently and it helped him relax just a little. If she wasn’t worried, then he shouldn’t be either. Clint joined them and opened the hatch, leading them out into a field area, where Steve could see a house farther out, a treeline just behind it.

“Clint?”

The older man smiled over at him, “This is my property. I talked Fury into wiping it from SHIELD’s records. It’s safer that way.”

Steve frowned, confused, but Clint didn’t elaborate. Steve looked over to Natasha, who obviously knew what was going on, but she didn’t say anything, either.

The house was nice, if a little worn; two stories with a large porch and a barn. 

Steve was trying to decide why it looked so lived in, though. If it was one of Clint’s safehouses, then it should be quite empty. He saw movement in one of the windows, then a couple others, and froze up on the path, hands reaching for weapons that he didn’t have. Clint and Natasha turned, then, and Clint was quick to set his hands on Steve’s shoulders.

“Hey, man. It’s okay, I promise. This is… This is my house. I know the people in there.” 

Natasha snorted. 

Clint rolled his eyes at her. “Relax, Steve. This is a safe place. No one here is going to hurt you. I promise. Come on.”

Clint slung his arm around Steve’s shoulders and led him the rest of the way up to the house, opening the door easily. It hadn’t been locked. 

Steve heard feet pounding. But they were… small feet. He startled as two young children ran into the room and clung to Clint’s legs. Clint broke away from Steve to scoop them up, kissing their cheeks and moving further into the house. Natasha closed the door and took Steve’s arm, forcing him to follow.

“Hey, Coop. Lila! You’re gettin’ so big, babygirl!”

A woman walked into the room, looking fond, and kissed Clint’s cheek. “Hey, honey. Baby’s sleeping upstairs.”

He kissed her temple and hummed, “Hi, sweetheart. We’ll keep it down. I brought a couple friends with me.”

The woman looked over and smiled warmly. She walked over and easily pulled Natasha into a hug. “It’s been a while, Nat. I’m glad you could come.”

Steve saw Natasha’s grin. “I wouldn’t miss a chance to see you… or these little monsters!” She laughed as the kids wiggled free of Clint’s arms and ran over to her, giving her big hugs with exclamations of, “Auntie Nat!”

Steve stayed to the side, trying not to be in the way. But Clint just walked right over and put an arm around him, “And this is Steve. Steve, this is my wife, Laura, and our kids, Cooper and Lila.”

Steve smiled a little and gave a small wave, “Hi. It’s nice to meet you.”

Laura smiled and pulled him into a small hug, “It’s nice to meet you, too.” She pulled back, still smiling warmly. “How about we all go sit in the living room. I’m sure we’ve got some things to talk about.”

Clint led Steve into the living room and had him sit on the couch. Natasha sat next to him and rubbed his back before settling into the couch. Lila climbed up into Natasha’s lap and cuddled up to her, and Cooper climbed up next to Clint on the loveseat. Laura sat next to Steve and angled to face him a little, still smiling gently. 

“So, Steve… Clint tells me you need a bit of a break.”

He swallowed and looked down, wringing his hands together, “Yeah, I… had a rough encounter a few weeks ago, and I’m not totally over it, I guess.”

She nodded and looked over at Clint, who gave a slow nod. She turned back to Steve. 

“We don’t have to talk about it right now. Or ever. That’s fine, too. Clint’s had so much stuff go on over the years…”

Steve could look up a little then, and he didn’t feel awkward at her compassionate expression.  “Thank you, ma’am.”

She shook her head a little and set a gentle hand on his shoulder, “Laura, please. I’m not that old yet.”

Steve managed a small smile, and then looked down sharply as he felt a small hand on top of his own. Lila was staring up at him. 

“You’re gonna hurt your hands, Mr. Steve.”

He stopped ringing them, and looked at his knuckles, which were turning red. “O-Oh… Thank you.” 

The girl smiled, “You’re welcome.” She climbed out of Natasha’s lap and onto Steve’s, taking his hands in her own. “Now you won’t hurt them anymore.”

Steve looked up at Laura and Clint, who were both grinning. 

Natasha stood and hummed, motioning to Clint, “You know, I think he’ll be just fine. We should get back.”

Steve’s eyes widened, “Wait, you’re… you’re leaving?”

Clint kissed Cooper’s head and stood before setting him down again on the loveseat. “Steve, trust us. You need to remove yourself from your normal environment, and that includes us. Nat and I still have work to do, and I promise you’re gonna be well taken care of, here.” He gave Steve’s shoulder a squeeze. “You can call us if you really think it won’t work, don’t worry.”

Steve swallowed hard, looking between the other three adults, and then at the little girl in his arms, already trying to make sure he didn’t hurt anymore than he did already. 

“Okay.”

~

Laura had apologized to Steve after Natasha and Clint had left. 

“We have a baby boy, Nathaniel. He’s sleeping upstairs, and I should check on him… I may not be able to help you out too much. But make yourself at home. Relax. I’m sure the kids won’t mind you lounging around.”

Steve had been shown his room, and then left to his own devices, mostly. He roamed the house, and then the property. The barn was large, but not for any livestock. There were tools and a tractor, and some other supplies stocked inside. He found a pen with a chicken coop and several chickens, and took a moment to just watch them. He wondered what it would be like, to have your only worry be when you were going to eat next.

“I like watchin’ the chickens, too.”

He jumped and looked to his left, where Lila stood, also watching the birds. 

“Um, yeah, they’re… pretty relaxed.”

She giggled, “I think they’re silly.” 

Steve turned to watch as one of them tripped over a root, squawking and flapping. Lila giggled and moved to open the pen, crawling inside without fear. Half of her disappeared into the coop and she came out a couple seconds later, hands cupped as she scurried back out of the pen. She closed the pen and then grinned up at Steve. 

“Hold out your hands!”

Steve looked at her cupped hands, and could hear the chick chirping inside, its little head trying to poke out between her fingers. He took a little step back, wringing his hands.

“Oh, um, no. No, I shouldn’t.” There was no way he should be holding any of these animals. He might hurt them. And he really didn’t want to hurt the babies. 

Lila was still smiling at him though, and set a gentle hand over both of, holding the chick firmly in her free hand, keeping it still, but also… not hurting it. 

“You won’t hurt it, Mr. Steve.” 

He smiled a little at her and held out one hand. “Okay…”

She giggled and shook her head, pulling his other one up. “You’ll wanna use both.”

He made a face, but kept both hands outstretched. Lila placed the chick gently in his hands. His fingers trembled, and then… nothing happened.

The chick peeped and tried to escape, so Steve cupped his hands a little steeper. The chick stayed put. Lila smiled up at him. 

“See? It’s not so bad.”

Steve smiled a bit and pet the chick’s head with his thumb. “No, I guess not.”

~

Steve found a pile of wood out at the back of the house. He wasn’t sure what Laura would say, but he wanted to calm some of his nervous energy. He’d gotten through several blocks before he heard the door of the house open and close. Cooper came up next to Steve, carefully. 

“I can help, Mr. Rogers.”

Steve stared at him for a moment, a little confused. “I… I think I’ve pretty well got it.”

Cooper smiled, “I can stack them, though. It’s supposed to go up against the house.”

He looked back at the house, and then nodded a little. “That’s fine. Just… Don’t let me hit you.”

“Don’t worry, my dad and I do this all the time.”

Something warm filled Steve’s chest, and he started chopping again,

~

Nights were rough. Steve was never quite able to get to sleep after the incident, and being in a new place certainly wasn’t helping. Every creak, every tap, every scuff was some new threat, and he just couldn’t get his fight or flight instincts to turn off enough for him to relax. Any sleep he achieved was after he had finally gotten so exhausted that he couldn’t keep his eyes open any longer. And even then it may not have been peaceful. 

The first few nights in the Bartons’ house, Steve didn’t sleep. The fourth day was hard for him to get through, and he collapsed into sleep that night. He woke in a cold sweat the next morning, Laura standing worriedly over him. He had recoiled, gripping the sheets tightly, and immediately regretted it. But she was patient with him, helping him calm down and pulling him into a hug.

Afterwards, he’d seen Lila standing in the doorway. Laura told him that Lila had heard him thrashing and come to get her. Steve was embarrassed at first, but then Lila ran in and jumped up onto the bed to hug him, too. 

~

“Lila, c’mon. It’s just a couple blankets!”

“No! Cooper! That’s my favorite Barbie blanket!”

“It’s just for a night!”

“No-o-o!”

Cooper took ahold of her shoulders and lowered his voice, “Lila. This is for Steve. We wanna help him feel better, right?”

Lila looked down at her toes, “Yeah…”

“Maybe since it helps you feel better, it’ll help him feel better, too.”

Lila looked over at her blanket for a few moments, then looked back at Cooper, grinning. 

~

Steve looked up as his bedroom door opened. It hadn’t woken him up, he was awake anyways, but it certainly put him on edge. Until Lila popped her head in, grinning widely. 

“Mr. Steve?”

He was sitting on the bed, reading, so he shifted to sit on the edge of the bed. “Is everything okay, Lila? You should be in bed, it’s late.”

She just giggled. “You gotta come downstairs.”

That made him tense, but he kept his expression soft. “What’s downstairs? Is everything okay?”

She huffed, “Mr. Steve, nothin’s wrong. Coop an’ I got a surprise for you!”

He frowned a little and stood, ready to follow her, “Are you sure it can’t wait until morning? You really should be in bed.” 

She huffed again and took ahold of his hands. “C’mon! Please, Mr. Steve? It’s really important!”

He relented, following her down the stairs. He halted at the bottom, though, staring at the mass of blankets and pillows that was protruding from the front of the couch. “What…?”

Cooper’s head popped out from the front of the mass. “Steve! C’mon, we made this for you!”

Steve just let Lila pull him over to the… well he supposed it was a blanket fort. He crawled inside and breathed a sigh of relief when he realized it was large enough to hold him. He was able to lean back against the front of the couch and look around at the fort, held up by the dining room chairs and several pillows. They’d used some of the blankets from the living room, but there were also what had to be a few of the kids’ own: one with Transformers, one with Power rangers, and a couple with the Disney Princesses.  

Cooper curled up to Steve’s side, “Lila said that you can’t sleep well upstairs, so… we set this up down here.”

Steve stared down at him in disbelief, and then over at Lila, who simply crawled into his lap and pulled an extra blanket with Barbie on it over them both. 

“This is my favorite blanket,” she murmured, “She helps me sleep. Maybe she can help you, too!”

Steve stared down at the children for a moment, and then his eyes started to water. He rubbed them quickly, and sniffled. 

“Thank you,” he said, softly. “Thank you, guys.”

Lila leaned up to kiss his cheek. “You’re welcome, Mr. Steve.”

The children fell asleep fairly quickly after that, it being so late at night. Steve stayed up, still unable to sleep. He watched over the kids until he saw the sunlight starting to pass through the opening of the blanket fort. During the night, Steve had started to carefully pull some of the blankets down, not disrupting the rest of the structure. He could see the living room this way, and he was able to better keep the kids warm with more blankets. So he could see Laura coming quietly down the stairs only a few minutes after the sun came up. 

She smiled gently at him and came over to sit on the couch, Nathaniel cradled in her arms. 

“I told them they couldn’t stay up too late working on it,” she murmured, not wanting to wake Cooper and Lila yet. “How late was it when they pulled you down here?”

“Ten-ish. They fell asleep pretty quickly after, though.”

Laura smiled a little wider and set a gentle hand on his shoulder, kissing his forehead. “Did it help?”

He leaned into her touch. “I couldn’t sleep, but it was nice. It’s… It’s been nice. Thank you, Laura. For letting me stay. 

She hummed, “Don’t mention it. We’re glad to have you.” Nathaniel gurgled and Laura sighed, “Well, relax here for a little longer. I’ve gotta make breakfast, or this little guy might revolt.”

Steve chuckled softly as Laura headed into the kitchen. Lila shifted in his lap, curling up closer, and Steve wrapped an arm around her, protectively. He looked out the window, at the sun coming up over the trees, and relaxed, closing his eyes. 


	14. Aftercare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve gets a little roughed up during a battle, and Tony takes care of him.

Tony supposed that ‘rough’ couldn’t really begin to describe their mission. Natasha was hospitalized, Barnes vigilant her side, and Bruce had disappeared to try and get himself calmed down, Sam following him from a distance to make sure he would get back safe. Tony was alright, the suit having blocked most of the damage. But he was going to have to make stronger hearing aids for Clint. He was going to be eternally thankful that Peter wasn’t allowed to skip school for this. And Thor and Steve had stayed behind with Scott and Hope for cleanup and rescue. Though, Steve had been moving weirdly and Tony wanted to make him come home.

Steve was not to be deterred, however, and kept on helping. 

There were times when Tony hated to be right; when he knew something bad would happen and no one else wanted to believe it. Now, Thor flew back to the Tower and rushed down to the lab, Steve pale and half awake in his arms. 

“Tony, he has been asking for you,” Thor rushed in between Tony’s swearing and demands to know why they didn’t just go to medical. 

“Well, take him up there and  _ then  _ come get me! Just-”

“Tony.” It was soft, almost a wheeze from Steve’s lips. “Please…”

The older man stared at him and then started to grumble, pushing Thor towards the elevator. “Medical. Now. Let’s go.”

~

Steve went easily to the medical wing of the Tower, still and quiet like the doctors asked as long as Tony was in sight. Tony stayed in the doorway the whole time, making sure he was always visible. But Steve’s eyes kept flicking up to meet his, staring or glancing over, and the doctors had to vie for his attention. At one point, Tony was pulled back into the hall by Thor, who had gone to visit Natasha and wanted an update on Steve. 

Tony gave him a run-down on the situation, but stopped him before he could go. 

“Stand there in the door for him for a bit. I need to run to the bathroom.”

Thor nodded, and Tony ran down the hall. He was quick and returned in almost no time at all. He heard noice from Steve’s room, though, and hurried to get inside. It quieted almost instantly, and Thor backed out of the room, pushing him even further forward. He walked into the room and noticed, with a sigh, that there were tears in Steve’s eyes, and the doctors were more frustrated than they had been. 

One of the nurses came over and spoke quietly to Tony. 

“The wound on his side is already healing, but he needs rest, Mr. Stark. The doctor wants to keep him here overnight.”

Tony glanced up at Steve and immediately know that wasn’t going to work. He shook his head. “I understand, but I think — I know — it will be too stressful for him. We should move him up to his floor. I’ll make sure he stays in bed.”

The nurse looked back at the doctor, a little helpless. The doctor looked even more put-out at Tony’s suggestion, but, to his credit, simply nodded. 

~

Getting Steve up to his room and into bed wasn’t the issue. It was getting him to relax and stay in the bed that was giving Tony angina. He had gotten Steve in, but he also had to communicate with the rest of the team now, just for a bit, and Steve was being ornery. He tried to keep him calm, but whatever the doctors had given him to help with the pain was just enough to make him act a little weird. 

“Steve!” he called into the bedroom for the fifth time. “Get in the bed! Now! No, I don’t want to hear it. I’ll be in in a minute. Lay down!”

Bruce, who had made it back to the Tower and sounded exhausted, managed a small laugh, “He’s being difficult, huh?”

Tony huffed, frustrated. “Yes! I know he needs someone right now, but I can’t do eight things at once.” He sighed. “I held his hand all the way up here, too, he should be at least a little calmer by now.”

Bruce was silent for a few moments, and Tony had to wonder if he’d fallen asleep. 

“He just needs some aftercare.”

“Pardon?”

“Aftercare. You know what that is, Tony, don’t play dumb.” 

“I know but that’s not usually for-”

“It’s still care, Tony, and he needs someone to watch after him right now.”

Tony sighed and glanced back into the bedroom where Steve was, to his chargain, sitting up. He he looked so forlorn…

“Alright. I just needed to let you all know what was up. Get some sleep, Brucie-Bear.”

Bruce gave another small chuckle, “No problem.”

Tony hung up and moved back into the bedroom. Steve perked up a little, and Tony couldn’t help a smile. He set his phone on the bedside table and reached over to gently pet Steve’s hair for a moment. Steve’s eyes closed and he leaned into it, and Tony just felt so much sympathy. He tapped Steve’s cheek, and his eyes opened, just a little. 

“Hey, Steve.”

Steve smiled, softly, “Hey…”

“I’m gonna go into the kitchen and get some things, okay? I need you to relax and stay put. Understand?”

Steve nodded slowly and closed his eyes again, “Understood.”

Tony ran his fingers through Steve’s hair one more time before heading into the kitchen. He put together several sandwiches and grabbed a case of Gatorade and a case of water. He hurried back to Steve’s room and found him exactly how he’d left him. He sat next to him on the bed and let Steve lean against his side. 

“You need to eat.”

Steve took a deep breath and nodded a little, accepting the sandwich Tony handed him. He was quiet as he ate, still as Tony started to pet his hair again. Once he’d eaten nearly the whole platter, Tony stopped him and helped him drink a bottle of water and one of the Gatorade. He set it all aside, then, and helped Steve lay down. 

The younger man whimpered, and Tony hushed him, “I’m not leaving. I’ve got you, Steve, you’re safe.”

Steve nodded and stayed down as Tony kicked off his shoes, getting under the sheets as well. He held Steve close, pulling another blanket over them both. He kept petting the other’s hair. 

“Sleep,” he said, softly. “I’ll wake you if I need to.”

Blue eyes turned up to his, and Steve nodded a little before closing them. “Yes, Tony.”

He huffed and kissed the top of his head. “Sure, kid. Sleep well.”

But Steve was already asleep.


	15. Brushes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim Rhodes isn’t someone Steve knows well, but he’s definitely in Steve’s corner.

It seemed that their team kept getting larger and larger. Not that it was a bad thing, really. But while Steve liked being around his team, being able to reach for any of them for comfort at a moment’s notice, he was starting to feel crowded. He had to turn away touches from his friends, feeling smothered sometimes if they were always in the same room. He started to become less free with his hugs, and some of his teammates expressed their worry, though he kept assuring them he was fine.

It took several weeks for them to all get to a point where he was comfortable with how much people were touching and working with him. It wasn't much, but it was enough for now.

Of course, then he had a few missions, and things went downhill for him quickly. Bucky — er, James — had gone with him on a mission to a Hydra base and suffered a setback on his rehab. Natasha was spending her time with him, and Steve found he couldn’t help but feel a little jealous. Scott and Hope kept their distance, and Peter wasn’t sure how he wanted to approach it all, Steve could tell. His touches were brief and hesitant. 

Jim Rhodes was over this week to see Tony, so that was where Tony was, keeping Jim entertained. Steve couldn’t blame him, really. But Bruce had gone to a conference with Dr. Foster and Dr. Pym, and Thor had tagged along. Clint was at his house for Lila’s birthday. They’d had a brief interaction a few days ago when Steve had handed him a wrapped present to give to the girl. Clint had hugged him tight for a moment. So that was all he’d gotten in the last few days. 

When Tony and Jim came up for food, Steve was sitting on the couch, moping and trying to focus on his movie. He stood to head into the kitchen, under the guise of needing more popcorn (but also needing more popcorn). He stared at the microwave as it popped, too aware of Tony and Jim conversing behind him. 

An arm suddenly brushed against his back, and Steve startled, head whipping around. Tony had been avoiding touching him too much, making sure that he wasn’t smothering Steve. He appreciated it, but, again, it wasn’t what he really needed just now. 

Except… it hadn’t been Tony’s arm. Jim looked back at him, frowning a little at Steve’s reaction. He took a step closer. 

“You okay, Steve?”

His hand brushed Steve’s shoulder, as if it were going to land on it, but he pulled away at Steve’s intake of breath. 

It was only a small point of contact, but Steve was already feeling warmer. 

“Yeah. I’m great.”

Jim watched him for another moment, and then nodded, grabbing what he had needed and moving back over to Tony. Steve smiled, just to himself, and took his popcorn out when the microwave beeped. He returned to his movie, slightly more relaxed. 

~

From then on, it continued to happen. He would pass Jim in the hall after a mission, or in the common room or kitchen whenever he came to visit Tony. Sometimes, Steve was alright, stable and focused, and they would just smile at each other and pass on by. But Steve was still in a weird place with his teammates, re-figuring-out when to touch and how much to touch when he needed it. Sometimes, Steve wasn’t alright, tired and touch-starved, and Jim would notice. They didn’t hug; they weren’t close like that. But Jim, whenever he saw Steve was hurting, would just brush their shoulders together, or bump him gently with his arm when Steve’s back was turned. Sometimes, if they were sitting next to each other at dinner or during a meeting, their knees would brush every once in a while. 

It just made Steve relax. He knew that someone was watching out for him, even if they weren’t totally comfortable with each other all the time. 

At some point, Tony must’ve asked Jim about it, because he started doing it, too. Natasha caught on quickly and would let her hand run through his hair, or her fingertips brush over his shoulders, whenever she passed behind him as he sat on the couch. Peter leaned into him more when they got together for video games, and Sam fell into the habit, finally finding that brushes were just what he was comfortable with. 

The next time Jim was over, Steve quietly pulled him aside.

“Um… I just wanted to… to thank you.”

Jim’s head cocked to the side. “Steve, you don’t have anything to thank me for.”

He felt his cheeks heat a little in embarrassment. “I mean… there is. You kept touching me, bumping into me, I mean, when everyone was being weird about it all, and… It helped me stay grounded.” He smiled a little, “And the others started, too, so that… That’s nice.” Jim was just smiling at him, a little bewildered. Steve shrugged, “So, thank you.”

Jim just gave him a short hug and a pat on the back. “You’re welcome, then.” He put an arm around Steve’s shoulders, starting to lead him back to the common area. “You can call me, by the way, if Tony’s being a dumbass about all this.”

Steve smiled again, huffing softly, “Thank you.”

Jim patted his shoulder, “No problem, kid.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to let you guys know that I probably won’t be updating like I was this summer. School has started, and I’m involved in a show, so I will be pretty busy from here on out.


	16. Pinned

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve trains with Thor and Natasha.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to Ava! Who requested more Thor and Nat.

He looked up as Natasha finally joined them, hands already wrapped and hair up. Thor grinned when he saw her and went to greet her. Steve stayed by the heavy bags, taking them down from where he’d set them up to get in his own small workout. Natasha had decided, since there were so many people now, that gym times needed to be shared by a few people. It had been Peter’s idea to make groups that would benefit the most from each other. It hadn’t worked out perfectly, but Steve felt pretty secure training with Natasha and Thor. 

He got to use his full strength when wrestling Thor, and he learned how to control it by training with Natasha. He knew Thor thought similarly. Natasha wouldn’t tell him what she got out of it, but he knew she enjoyed it. 

Still, he often just needed his own time to clear his head, so he did that before they started their group workout. Endurance training, he called it - which usually received several eye rolls. 

A pat on his shoulder snapped him out of his thoughts. He smiled a little as he turned to face Natasha, and she just smirked back. 

“Ready to get your ass handed to you on the mats?”

He scoffed, “Are you?”

“Ready to hand you your ass? Yes, Sir.”

Steve rolled his eyes and just headed over to the boxing ring, though they tended to use it for that and everything else. Thor was stretching, and they joined him for a few minutes before Natasha slipped back outside the ring, smirking like she knew something he didn’t. Which was highly likely.

“I’ll let you boys have the ring first, today.”

Thor chuckled and nodded, “I wonder if that is the best idea.” He focused on Steve, “I don’t plan on going easy on you, today.”

Steve shrugged, getting into a defensive stance, “Neither does she. But what else is new?”

Thor let out another booming laugh and then lunged for Steve. For the both of them, agility had been something Natasha was helping them improve, and Steve could tell it was paying off. Thor was moving much quicker, and Steve found it harder and harder to evade him. Steve was a smaller build, naturally more agile, but Thor was a quick study and was quickly matching him for skill.

Steve twisted away from one of Thor’s jabs a little awkwardly, and would’ve quickly recovered, but Natasha made a disapproving noise off to the side, and he was distracted for a moment. Thor took the opportunity and tackled him, pinning him down to the mat, covering him with his whole body. 

He found he didn’t really want to struggle. He took a deep breath and let his forehead press against the mat. He had been meaning to go talk to Tony for days now, but… this was nice. He was covered and warm and safe… He started to relax, and he made a soft noise of discontentment when Thor started to get up. 

Thor paused, and Steve could see the movement of Natasha nodding, off to the side. Thor moved, letting his body hold Steve from the chest down. Natasha climbed up into the ring and pinned down his arms, loosely. She didn’t need to hold them roughly, he didn’t really want to move. She smiled and leaned close, pressing her cheek to his. 

“You okay, Steve?”

He hummed, face turning a little more towards hers. “‘M okay…”

“Better?”

He nodded a little, murmuring, “Yeah…”

Natasha’s head tipped up a little, and Steve didn’t even care what look she might be sharing with Thor. 

~

Steve was a little unsettled by the fact that he had enjoyed being covered up like that, when before all he had needed was a hug or a touch. 

Natasha assured him that it was a normal thing. Tony had said, jokingly, “Nothing wrong with being a little submissive.” Steve had blushed, and then Tony had laughed and pulled him into a hug before showing him the new suit updates he was working on for the team. Sam had told him that, if it made him feel safe and wasn’t self-destructive, it was probably just fine, but he shouldn’t do it if it made him uncomfortable. 

“Isn’t that how we did it one time?” Bruce asked, eating a late dinner while Steve and Clint watched a movie. 

Steve frowned and looked over at him, “What do you mean?”

“That time that we watched Lord of the Rings, and we all ended up basically on top of you on the floor. That was the most relaxed I’d seen you in a while.”

Steve stared at him, and then looked back at Clint, who shrugged and nodded. 

“He’s not wrong.”

~

Steve tried to pin down Thor the next time they trained, and he managed. But Thor flipped him right back over and pinned him down, the impact knocking his breath away.. He sucked in air, trying to get it back. 

“What… what are you guys doing…?” he huffed out between heaves. 

Natasha knelt in front of him. “What do you mean?”

He glared up at her as best he could. “This… pinning… thing.”

She shrugged, “We figured it might help you out, since the sparring itself didn’t do much for you.”

Thor cut in, from above, voice careful, “You still have trouble coming to us, Steven. We thought that, perhaps, this could help. Before you stress yourself too much again.”

Steve was silent for a few minutes, and then just gave in, relaxing against the mat. “Well,” he muttered, muffled by the mat, “can’t say s’not workin’...”

Natasha laughed softly and sat in front of him, leaning over to gently pet his hair. He groaned softly. Slowly, as he relaxed more and more, his breathing evened out, and he almost fell asleep on the mat. The doors opened a while later, but Steve’s eyes were closed and he was nearly asleep. Thor and Natasha were above him, and would definitely keep him safe if it happened to be something threatening. Instead, he heard James’ voice. 

“‘Tasha-“ He cut himself off, then started again, “Is he okay, pauchok?” It was whispered, like he’d suddenly seen what was going on, and was very concerned. 

Steve could hear the smile in her voice, “He is fine, milaya. Just resting.”

He could hear the steps, his ear to the mat, when James climbed into the ring. The light changed behind Steve’s eyelids when James sat next to Natasha. He didn’t touch Steve, but it was quiet for a while. And just knowing that he was there, Steve felt a little safer, a little more content.


	17. Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s a certain bond that war creates between men; a bond that transcends time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, Ava, for the suggestion! I’m not too familiar with Logan, oops, but I’d imagine this is something that could happen.

Meeting him again had been a shock. Steve knew that James had survived, due to Hydra, but everyone else from the war was old or gone. 

Logan was a surprise. Steve and the Commandos had teamed up with Corporal Howlett at one point for a while, and Steve had liked the man. He was older than the others, and Steve had learned a lot from him. 

So when he showed up later, during a fight, Steve fell into a rhythm with him fairly quickly. It wasn’t until after, when he got a chance to really recognize him, that he realized why. They were on the jet home, and the man, Wolverine, pulled off his mask and then it just hit him, 

“Corporal?”

It had been silent, everyone resting, but all heads turned to him. Logan looked over, and gave him a small smile, already lighting up a cigarette. 

“Hey, Cap. It’s been a while.”

Steve had to wait until they landed, but he pulled Logan aside, having a soft conversation. He asked him questions about everything and anything Logan might be willing to answer, and, after a while, Logan just stopped him, and pulled him into a hug. 

“Calm down, kid. You got time.”

Steve took a deep breath and, for a minute, just hugged back. 

~

They welcomed Logan into the Tower and gave him a guest room for a while. He tended to spend a lot of time with Steve. They talked about what happened after the war, and Logan told Steve some more personal stories about what had been going on for the last seventy years. He told him what the scientists did, and how it had helped him — in the least gruesome ways. Steve didn’t press, either. 

But they were having a conversation in Steve’s kitchen, sitting next to each other, knees and elbows touching, when James came out of his room. 

He didn’t do that often, when Steve was just back from a mission, preferring to give him space for a few days before ‘encroaching’ on his space. Steve could tell, though, from his expression that he was actually a little suspicious. He came around the corner slowly, his left arm behind his back in order to keep it free to use in case of an attack. His eyes immediately locked onto Logan, and his body froze halfway into the doorway. 

Logan stared back, keeping himself carefully loose. The room was silent for a while, and it was tense. Steve didn’t know what to do, or say. He kept his eyes on James, worried about how he might react. 

“Barnes. It’s been a while. I like what you’ve done with your hair.” Logan broke the silence, and both James and Steve tensed. 

Slowly, warily, James moved further into the kitchen, and sat across from Logan, still holding eye contact with him. He kept his arm slightly behind himself. 

“I know you,” James said, though Steve thought it sounded more like a question. 

Logan took a drag from his cigar. “We were in the war together, Sarge.” James looked away, and Logan leaned in a little, “You don’t remember, much, do you?”

James didn’t look back, “I try.”

He nodded, “Some days, kid, that’s all you can do.”

James was still for another moment, and then stood and quickly left the room.

Steve watched him go, sighing heavily. Logan’s hand landed gently on his shoulder, and pulled him closer for a careful side-hug. 

“You didn’t tell me about him, Rogers.”

Steve looked down and shrugged, “He’s… it’s hard sometimes, and I just… He’s hurting, and I don’t know how to help him sometimes. Natasha knows. He’s with her a lot.”

The older man huffed, laughing softly, “I think it’s a little more that that, kid.”

Steve’s head ducked and he muttered, “Yeah…”

Logan was silent for a few moments, and then he turned to pull Steve into a better hug. 

“Kid. It ain’t your fault, and I’m sure he’ll come around, alright.” His grip tightened a little as Steve started to hug back, shivering just slightly. “Barnes it tough, I know that. He’ll deal with it his way, and then he’ll come back.” Steve could hear the small smile in his voice as he continued:

“He always did.”


	18. Rest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve’s teammates try to make sure that he takes time for himself, though their methods can sometimes be a little... off.

Tony watched Steve trudge into the kitchen, bags under his eyes. 

“Hey, Steve… You look… tired?”

Steve gave him a look, and then dragged himself over to the coffee machine, picking up the pot and drinking down half the pot. Tony’s eyes widened, and he ignored Clint’s, “Awe, coffee, no,” in favor of trying to gently pull the pot from Steve’s hands. Steve wouldn’t let go, though.

“Steve, bud, that’s not… you’ll burn your mouth. C’mon.”

“Mm-mm… I nee’ it.”

Tony shook his head, “Steve. Hey, c’mon. Let go.”

Steve scowled at him, sticking out his bottom lip, but let Tony take it from him. “Tony…”

“If you get a mug, sure. But we yell at Clint for this, c’mon.”

“Hey!”

Steve sighed, ignoring Clint, and crossed his arms. Tony rolled his eyes and poured Steve a mug. The younger man stared at the drink for a few minutes before setting it aside. Tony put his hands on his hips. 

“Seriously?”

Clint hurried up and stole the mug before dashing into the living room. “Nat! Tony’s about to yell at Steve, can sit with you?”

Tony turned around to shout at Clint to shut up, but saw Natasha dragging him out of the room by his ear. He turned back around to see a small smile on Steve’s face, but his eyes were starting to glaze over. Tony frowned and moved over to rest his hands on his shoulders. 

“Steve. Hey, focus, bud.”

Steve’s eyes cleared, slowly. “Sorry, I just… I haven’t, uh, slept well the last… few nights.”

Tony started to pull him into the living room and over to the couch. “What’s going on? Nightmares?”

Steve huffed and shook his head, “You could say that.”

They sat on the couch and Tony had Steve lay down, his head on Tony’s lap. 

“What do you mean?”

He sighed, closing his eyes and tucking his knees up to his chest, “Buck’s been havin’ nightmares… not me.”

Tony gave a soft noise of sympathy and started to pet Steve’s hair. “I’m sorry, bud. Is he loud?” Steve nodded. “That’s okay. You can sleep right here for a while. JARVIS’ll keep people quiet.”

Steve smiled and looked up at Tony for just a minute. “Thanks, Tony.”

“No problem. Go on and sleep.”

Tony kept petting Steve’s hair until he fell asleep. He was starting to doze off himself when he heard footsteps. Wanda came around the couch and took a deep breath, watching them for a moment. She knelt, then, and cupped his cheek, using her magic to help him sleep deeper.

“I saw Mr. Howlett this week,” she murmured, looking up at Tony. She sat on the floor, crossing her legs. “He said that Steve wasn’t doing well with James.”

Tony hummed, “Apparently James isn’t doing so well, either.”

She frowned, and nodded, “I’ve… felt it. I think Mr. Howlett brought up some memories for him.”

They were silent for a few moments, before Wanda stood. 

“I’m going to talk to him.”

“Wanda-“

“I will be fine. And keep your voice down. Steve needs his sleep.” She fixed Tony with a hard glare. “When he wakes, keep him down here. Get him to rest. He needs it. For more than just lack of sleep.”

Tony frowned, but she raised her eyebrow and he kept his suspicions to himself. “Fine. I think we can manage.”

~

It was several hours before Steve woke up, and when he did, he was sure that whatever his head was laying on now was different than what he’d been laying on when he fell asleep. He turned, just slightly and forced his eyes open. Natasha was there, smiling gently down at him. 

“You must’ve had a rough night,” she said, running her fingers through his hair. “You never sleep that deeply.”

He grunted and rolled onto his other side so that she could keep petting his hair. He liked when she did it, because she tended to use her fingernails, and that always felt nice. He thought for a moment, though, about what to say. He didn’t want to worry her about James. 

“Yeah… Nightmares.”

She cooed softly and scratched gently at his nape. “I’m sorry, Steve. Wanna talk about it?”

He sighed, relaxing into her touch. “Mm-mm…”

“That’s fine.” She was silent for a few more moments, “You think you’ll sleep more?”

He shook his head just slightly, “I don’t think I could.”

His stomach took that moment to yowl, and Natasha gave a small huff of laughter. She gave him a push to get him to sit up, and then pulled him into the kitchen. 

“Tony said you didn’t eat, so I made breakfast.” She kissed his cheek and pushed him into a chair. “Eat.”

Steve smiled softly and nodded, “Thanks. Did you eat already?”

She nodded, even as she sat next to him. “Yes, but I’m not gonna leave you alone. Don’t worry.”

He smiled a little more, and nodded.

~

Peter ran into the room as Natasha and Steve were finishing washing the dishes. He looked around and then pulled himself together, trying to seem nonchalant. 

“Hey-y-y…”

Steve raised an eyebrow at him, and Natasha sighed, rolling her eyes. Steve looked at her, confused, but she refused to give him any sort of answer. He rolled his eyes and looked back over at Peter.

“Hey, kid. What’s up?”

Peter shrugged, and crossed his arms, trying to look cool by leaning up against the doorframe. 

“Nothing much. Just… uh… Wanna play some Mario Kart? When you’re done?” He shrugged. “Or, I mean, we could play UNO or something-”

“Pete,” Steve interrupted, “it’s fine.” He frowned a little, “Are you feeling okay? You’re acting kind of weird.”

Peter froze, “No, yeah, I’m… great. Just wanted to know if you’d want to hang out a bit.”

Steve gave him a small smile, “Of course I do. Just let me finish up-”

“Go ahead,” Natasha said, quickly. “There’s not much left. Just go relax with Peter. You had a rough night.”

Steve frowned at her. Usually, if anyone were to stay behind and finish the dishes, she’d make him do it. She gave him a look that said she wasn’t backing down though, so he sighed and turned to dry his hands. 

“Fine.”

Peter grinned, looking oddly like he’d just achieved something great, and pulled Steve into the living room. 

They ended up putting in a movie, for background noise, and then getting out the Monopoly board. Monopoly wasn’t played very often in the Tower, due to the personalities of the team, but one-on-one games weren’t too rare, especially with Peter around. Wanda was banned from playing, though, lest she read someone’s mind. That was generally how it went for board games. 

Steve was winning, easily, and they finished a game in only a couple hours. Peter huffed and demanded a rematch, to which Steve laughed, but humored him. The next game took longer, Steve going a little easier on the kid, but he still managed to win. 

They were switching the film before they started the next game when Pietro sauntered in, gait slow and easy despite his abilities. 

“Hello, Steve. Peter. Have you seen Wanda today? She disappeared after we had breakfast.”

Steve frowned a little, “Um, no, I haven’t. But I’d be glad to help you look.” He started to stand, only Peter grabbed his arm. 

“Um, actually, Nat knows where she is, I think. And, um, she’s probably in the gym, so…”

Both Steve and Pietro gave him weird looks, but Peter seemed to be a little off today, so Steve let it go. Pietro turned on his heel and headed for the elevator. 

“Right… thanks.”

Steve frowned at Peter, who shrugged and just turned back to their game like everything was normal. 

It was turning out to be an odd day, but it wasn’t like Steve had never had odd days before. He just… wasn’t used to them being this kind of odd. 

~

Tony came back in near the tail end of Steve and Peter’s third game. Steve was kicking Peter’s ass, again, and was soon victorious. He was shocked, again, when Tony came and sat with them, bringing lunch. 

“Tony-”

“It’s lunchtime, Cap. Don’t tell me you forgot.” Tony was smirking, like he thought he was being funny. But Steve wasn’t amused. 

“You never remember to eat lunch.”

Tony shrugged, “I had JARVIS remind me. I wanted to check on you, since your night was so rough.”

Steve frowned, starting to say something else, but Tony just started to eat. So he sighed, and started to eat as well. Peter was looking between the two of them as they ate. He handed out money for another round of Monopoly, and included Tony. He protested that he had work to get done. But Steve raised an eyebrow at him. 

“If you have time to remember to eat, you have time for a round of Monopoly.”

Tony huffed and rolled his eyes, but stayed and played one game with them, smoking them both. Steve had expected that. Only, it took way longer than Tony would have ever allowed before. 

The older man stood after the game finally ended and shrugged, “Oh, well. Guess I’m still the reigning champion, huh?”

Steve was frowning up at him, “Yeah… I guess so.” He started to stand as well, suddenly having a thought. “Well, I’ve got some stuff Ineed to take care of, too. I haven’t been to the gym today-”

“Hey, no. You had a rough night, you should relax up he-”

“Tony, I have bad nights all the time. Trust me, I’m okay. Sleeping on the couch with you and Nat helped. I’m alright now.”

“Yeah, but-”

“Why are you keeping me on this floor?”

Tony was speechless for a moment. And Peter looked like a deer caught in the headlights. Tony was quick to recover. 

“We just want you to be able to relax. You never do after you’ve had a bad night. You should today. It would be-”

“You know,” Steve cut him off, again, “I wasn’t actually the one who had a bad night.” He headed for the elevator. “If there’s anyone we should be helping-”

“JARVIS, lock down the elevator.”

Steve whirled around to face Tony, fists clenching. “What the hell?”

Tony shrugged, “You’re gonna stay here and relax.”

Steve took a step forward. “That’s not your call to make!”

“It is now.”

Steve turned his focus on Peter, whose head was down. The kid flinched anyways, because Steve knew he could feel it. 

“Peter. Look at me.” Peter’s head raised slowly. Steve took a deep breath, keeping himself from being too angry. “Peter, you were in on this?” Peter nodded. “And Nat?”

Peter looked a little sad, “I just wanted to help, Steve. I swear. You gotta take time to just rest.”

Steve stared at him for a moment, and then sighed, heading back to the couch. 

“Fine. But if I’m gonna relax, we’re gonna do it my way.”

~

Clint came back to join them halfway through the movie Steve chose:  _ Some Like it Hot _ . Natasha followed soon after. She climbed over the back of the couch, though, and sat on the back, her legs bracketing Steve’s shoulders as she let her hands play with his hair. 

He stayed stiff for the first several minutes, just so that she knew he was upset with her. But when she leaned down to kiss his cheek in an apology, he let himself relax, just closing his eyes a moment to enjoy the gentleness in her touches. 

After the movie, Steve was nearly asleep from Natasha’s hands, and Tony started to put in another older movie -  _ The Wizard of Oz.  _ But the elevator doors opened and Logan entered, carrying a barely-awake Wanda, Pietro trailing behind. Steve frowned and sat up, forcing himself to awareness. 

“Wanda?” 

She hummed in response, opening her eyes. But she couldn’t manage much more. Steve sat up straighter in concern, but Natasha pulled him back down. 

Logan came over, giving him a wry smile, “She was helpin’ Barnes today. Called me in after lunch to see if I could help at all. Took a lot outta ‘er.”

Pietro stepped forward, “JARVIS said you were watching that, um, Marilyn Monroe movie. She likes that one, and I thought, well, maybe it would help her relax.”

Tony froze, not putting in the new movie. He looked to Steve, who nodded. 

“Of course. We’ll just put it back in.” He looked at Wanda, feeling guilty. “Can… Could I hold her?”

Logan smirked and nodded when Wanda made a positive hum. “Sure. Like to be surrounded by the ladies, huh?”

Steve blushed as Logan passed her to him, letting him cradle her close, petting her hair. “You’re a sick man, Corporal.”

Logan shrugged and pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket, heading for the balcony. “Guilty as charged.”

Pietro sat on the couch to Steve’s left, taking Tony’s spot and giving Clint a small kick in the side. Tony huffed and moved to sit to Steve’s right, next to Peter. But Peter shook his head and moved to the floor, leaning back against the couch, but keeping Steve’s legs as a barrier between him and Clint, let the other decide to poke him or some nonsense. Tony sat next to Steve, and started to gently rub Wanda’s shoulders where he could reach. Steve was already carefully petting her hair. 

“You shouldn’t exert yourself,” he murmured to her. 

She smiled just a little and took a deep breath to murmur back, “He needed someone. You needed a rest.”

Steve shook his head and kissed her forehead. “You rest, now. Thank you.”

Wanda smiled and nodded, closing her eyes. She listened to the movie for a while, and he could hear when her breaths changed and she fell asleep. 

Halfway through the film, Pietro leaned over and said, softly. “He really is doing better.” Steve stiffened, but was listening. “He should sleep through the night tonight.”

Steve nodded a little and closed his eyes. He just focused on his own breathing, and Natasha’s hands petting his hair and rubbing his shoulders. He smiled a little as his teammates around him laughed, and let his head roll back to lay against Natasha’s thigh, just resting.


	19. Cradled

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James decides he needs to straighten some things out with Steve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tithenmin said I needed more Bucky! I've been trying to work him into the last few chapters as a work up to this. I hope it's worked out, haha.

Nightmares may not have been so much a problem, after Wanda helped James, but being in Steve’s apartment was always weird. And while James tried not to be obvious about that, he knew he didn’t always succeed. He had woken up that morning and gone out to the kitchen to make breakfast. There were bacon and eggs in the fridge, and James, groggy, didn’t even think, simply grabbing enough for himself. He got to work at the stove. 

It was as he was just sitting down and tucking into his meal that Steve walked in, freezing just inside the doorway. 

James had a large appetite, so he had made a lot of food, but it was clear that it was just enough for himself. He watched Steve’s face become a little more closed off, more awake than he had been a moment before. Something unpleasant curled around in James’ stomach. 

Steve gave a small smile and a soft, “Good morning.” He moved to the fridge and looked around a moment before pulling out the orange juice and pouring himself a large glass. He got a bowl from the cabinet and pulled the Frosted Flakes down from the pantry. He poured what was a relatively small bowl of cereal, going back to the fridge for milk, and then carried his food and juice out into the living room area, grabbing a spoon on his way out. 

This made James frown, his gut curling tighter. Steve usually said more to him in the morning, or at least sat with him. Well, actually, Steve was up first and already at the table. James couldn’t reconcile eating anywhere but at the table, so they ended up sitting together whether he wanted to or not. 

And Steve certainly always ate more than a bowl of cereal. 

James quickly finished eating and moved silently into the doorway. Steve was sitting on the couch, hunched over his bowl, and watching the news on low volume. He wasn’t really paying attention, though, James could tell. He looked sad. Let down?

He pressed his hand against his abdomen, hoping to relieve the unbearable tightness there. He wasn’t uncomfortable around Steve, per se, but he wasn’t sure that he was doing the right things around him. He took a deep breath and moved to sit on the floor next to Steve’s legs. He noticed how the other man tensed a little, but didn’t move away. He let his head rest against Steve’s knee. He remembered holding Steve’s hand that first time. He didn’t mind that and other small touches. But he didn’t like them very often. Usually, he would notice when Steve was having an especially hard time, and he might sit next to him and offer a hand. 

Steve would hold it tightly, like he was terrified to let go.

But James couldn’t handle that right now. So he just settled for letting his head rest against Steve’s leg. 

The news was some shit about a senate vote that sure seemed like a lot of fuss over nothing, and a short blurb about a protest somewhere in the Midwest that seemed like it should be a larger fuss. 

He startled when Steve gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze, and sat up. He heard Steve huff, quiet and wry. James wished he wouldn’t tense up when Steve touched him first but… it was hard not to. 

“I’m going to the gym.”

“What about your group?” He knew that this wasn’t Steve’s gym day. 

But Steve was already heading back to his room to change. James frowned and stood, crossing his arms and standing over by the elevator so that Steve couldn’t pass him by on his way out. 

Except… Steve didn’t come back out to the living room. But James had heard him come out of his room. He moved slowly to the kitchen, and grunted unhappily when he saw the emergency staircase door was open. He closed it and sighed, heading for the couch again. He looked up at the ceiling, and around at the corners of the room. He knew that JARVIS monitored the rooms with cameras hidden in the walls. He frowned a little before saying, softly, hesitantly, “JARVIS?”

“Yes, Sergeant Barnes?” JARVIS’ voice was always soft and careful when he answered James, but something about the voice coming from seemingly nowhere always startled him, even when he expected it. 

“Where is Natasha?”

There were a few seconds of silence, and then the answer, “In her room, Sergeant Barnes. Would you like me to direct her to this floor?”

“Please, JARVIS.” He sat on the couch as the curl in his stomach became a knot.

It was silent for a minute or so, and then the AI made him jump again, “She is on her way, Sergeant Barnes.”

“Thank you, JARVIS.”

“You’re welcome, Sergeant Barnes.”

James didn’t like the constant formal addresses the AI made, but it wasn’t something he was going to complain about. He knew he didn’t have that kind of standing in the Tower. He curled up at the corner of the couch, pulling his knees up to his chest, his eyes locked on the elevator. 

They opened soon enough and Natasha walked in. He relaxed a little as she came closer and leaned over to press a gentle kiss to his cheek. 

“Rough night, milaya?” 

He shook his head, “I… I have messed up, pauchok.”

She cooed sympathetically and sat next to him, putting an arm around him. Her arms were deceptively small. He knew their danger well, but he still took comfort in their small size, not minding her touches at all. 

“What happened?”

He explained what he had done after waking, and how Steve had reacted. 

“And he’s gone down to the gym. Though I know it isn’t your day for that.”

Natasha frowned, “No, it’s not.” She pulled her phone from her bra, which James was careful not to watch, and texted someone quickly. She tucked it away again, and then pulled him closer, hugging him and petting his hair. “Steve is… having a rough few days. He’s frustrated.”

“With me.”

She opened her mouth, and then hesitated, thinking through what she might say. His stomach knotted tighter, the pressure moving up towards his sternum. 

“With… how things are progressing between you two, yes. You tend to have a hard time living in a space with him when, before, it was all he knew.” She sighed and started to pet his hair. “It’s hard for him to know that things are so much more different now than they were before, and it’s even harder for him to experience it.”

James just leaned into her touch for a few minutes, and then looked up at her. “What should I do?”

She shook her head, “Just keep doing what you are comfortable with. Try to push yourself a little, but I wouldn’t recommend doing things because you think Steve will like it. He’s a tough kid, he can handle it.”

A memory of Steve flashed through James’ mind. Small and bloody, but standing tall and grinning. Steve had been able to handle anything back then. Surely he’d be able to handle this now. 

~

James had nearly fallen asleep again as Natasha pet him, but he became alert again, eyes snapping open, as the elevator doors opened. 

Thor entered, the room, carrying a fuming Steve over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Steve’s face was all red, and he was angrily muttering something under his breath that sounded vaguely Irish. But when Steve’s eyes landed on Natasha and James on the couch, curled up to each other, his mouth closed and his expression shuttered. He looked away, and, where James had finally gotten his belly to relax, knots tied again in his stomach and chest. 

Some part of him really hated that Steve caused that. 

Thor nodded at Natasha and continued to carry Steve back to his bedroom. James heard the door close, and it was barely a minute before he started to hear the men’s voices raising through the walls. 

He looked nervously up at Natasha, who simply started to hum something and pet his hair again. He was able to block out the shouting for several minutes, almost dozing again. 

A loud, painful-sounding thud and crack sounded through the apartment, and both James and Natasha were immediately off the couch and down the hall, bursting through Steve’s door, ready to fight if needed. Thor held a hand out to them, palm up as if to hold them back. 

Steve was facing the left wall, shoulders hunched tightly and head ducked. He clutched his right wrist in his left hand and James could see the fine tremors running up his spine and through his shoulders. Small drops of blood were dripping onto the carpet, and James’ eyes were drawn to a hole in the left wall. A lump formed in his throat. 

Quietly, shakily, Steve spoke, “Please, leave.”

James thought he was going to take a step back, but his legs took him forward instead. He moved slowly across the room to Steve until he was standing in front of the younger man. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Natasha and Thor slowly backing out of the room. He focused on Steve’s face. Steve’s eyes were fixed firmly on the floor, and his lips were trembling with the effort it was taking him to keep his jaw clenched shut. 

Gently, James reached to pry Steve’s fingers from around his wrist. Steve sucked in a harsh breath, but James kept going, carefully examining the injured hand. The knuckles were bruised, the skin split, and his wrist was sprained, but James didn’t see any broken fingers. 

“Bathroom,” he ordered, gently, and started to lead Steve that direction. Thankfully, he followed with little resistance. 

He got Steve to sit on the edge of the tub while he got the first aid supplies to clean and wrap his hand. 

Steve kept his head bowed, though, chin tucked to his chest as he let James bandage his hand. James didn’t try to speak to him, though maybe he should have. Once he finished, blood carefully washed away and gauze taped in place, Steve was quick to pull his hand away and stand up. 

“Thanks, Buck- James, but I… I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine.”

“I would’ve taken care of it myself.”

“No, you wouldn’t have.” 

Steve was moving quickly back into his bedroom, but James caught up to him. 

“Steve-”

“Leave me alone.”

“I’m not gonna leave you alone to-”

“To what?” Steve whirled around, looking him in the eye for the first time. He was hurt and angry and James halted, unsure what he could even say. 

“Hurt yourself. You… punched the wall.”

Steve rolled his eyes, which just made James a bit angry. 

“I was provoked. I’m not gonna hurt myself B-” he stopped himself, cleared his throat, and continued. “I’m not stupid.”

“I didn’t say you were stupid.”

Again, Steve rolled his eyes. He started to leave, heading for the living room, and James clenched his jaw, striding forward and grabbing Steve’s arm, spinning him around. 

“Punk,” he growled. “You gotta stop actin’ like this. It ain’t good.”

Steve was frozen for just a moment, and then he jerked out of James’ hold, marching back in the other direction, away from his door.  _ Good _ , James thought. 

“Never stopped me before, Buck, why do you care now?”

It was bitter, and low, and James was sure that he’d never heard Steve speak to him like that. Ever. 

“I always cared,” he said, immediately, though quite angrily. He paused. “Maybe not right when I saw you again, no. But I’ve been caring a long time, punk, and if you can’t see that, then you’re the one with the problem. Not me.”

Steve spun around to face him, glaring at him, accusing, “You avoid me. Constantly. You’d rather be around Natasha. I’m sure you’d rather be rooming with her.”

James stared at Steve like he’d grown a second head. “Steve… I…” He shook his head, taking a breath. “Natasha and I… We have a history, and-”

“And we don’t?”

“Let me finish!” He glared at Steve, and he shut his mouth. “She knows what I’ve been through more than you do. She… She has less expectations for me, too.” He tried to look apologetic, “Steve I know that you are trying to help me, but you remember a version of me that I don’t. And I’d like to remember, if just to make things easier for us, but…” Steve’s head ducked and James sighed. “I can’t, and I know you want me to, and that makes it hard to know what you expect from me sometimes.”

Steve was starting to look unbearably sad, and James moved closer. 

“I do care,” James said, softly. “I try to help when I feel able. But Steve… please, I need you to be patient with me.”

Steve was silent for several moments, and then sniffled, looking to the side. “I.. I’m sorry, B- James.”

James just shook his head a little and pulled Steve into a loose hug. Steve didn’t hug back, but James suspected that was Steve trying to make sure James was comfortable - and he appreciated that. 

“Come on.”

He pulled back and started to lead Steve into the living room, ignoring the confused look on the other’s face. Thor and Natasha were talking quietly in the kitchen, but he just ignored them, dragging Steve to the couch. He sat in the corner and took a deep breath, centering himself. 

“You need a hug,” he said, matter-of-factly. “And I think I would like to give it to you.”

Steve took a deep breath of his own, looking nervous, and just nodded. “O-Okay. If you’re sure.”

The fight was all gone, and James couldn’t help but smile a little. He pulled Steve down and had him curl up, cradling him against his chest. Steve was stiff for several minutes, but he started to relax as James began rubbing his back and shoulders. His head drooped and rested against James’ chest. It eased the tightness in James’ stomach, and he, too, relaxed. He watched Natasha and Thor slowly, quietly, come out of the kitchen and head for the elevator. Thankfully, Steve’s head just stayed down. He tensed slightly, but didn’t move otherwise. Thor gave James a nod as he pressed the elevator call button, and then turned to face the doors. Natasha shared a smile with him across the room, and then blew him a small kiss farewell when the doors opened. 

The two of them were not gone long when Steve let out a small snore, startling James slightly. He cooed softly, not of his own volition, and cradled him closer. Eventually, James closed his own eyes, and simply started to let himself enjoy Steve’s closeness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say, I posted Chapter 18 a year and a day after I posted the first chapter. This has been an absolutely crazy year, and I can't believe I've been working on this for so long! Originally, it was just going to be a single chapter fic, and a friend of mine suggested I write a 'sequel'. I just tagged it on as a second chapter and, well, you can all see how it's grown, since. I'm extremely grateful for everyone who has been reading. You guys have no idea how awesome I feel when I see that someone new has left kudos, or that there is a new comment. It's gotten me through some things this year, and I thank you all so, so much for that.
> 
> I am going to be posting one more chapter after this, and I think it will be a good way to wrap this up. I'd love to keep this going forever, but I do believe that it's best to bring this to a close. If you wish to read more short stories from me, I suggest checking out my other WIP, "Sentence Prompt Answers", which I will be focusing on once I finish here. 
> 
> Again, thank you all for your support and inspiration. Here's to a fruitful year of writing!


	20. Cosset

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cos·set /ˈkäsət/ verb
> 
> care for and protect in an overindulgent way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my final installment, but I’d like to remind everyone that I’m going to be really working on my other piece “Sentence Prompt Answers” which I will be having to find another name for, I think, lol. Check it out for more short stories!

Tony had been working in the lab for almost a week now. Lab binges weren’t unusual, Steve knew that. And, lately, he’d been healthier about it all, too. He didn’t sleep as much, and still drank way-y-y too much coffee. But he ate regular meals now, and took breaks when people came down to check on him, at least.

But that didn’t change the fact that it had been a  _ week _ . 

Steve had been alright for a while. Casual touches from Peter and the twins had kept him going. He’d had coffee with Hope last Tuesday, when she and Scott had come to the Tower for the month. They split their time now, and it was actually working quite nicely. Sparring with Natasha and Thor had been fine, and if he had let Thor pin him once or twice without much of a fuss, that was nobody’s business but his own. 

James was doing better, and he tended to respond to “Bucky” or “Buck” if he was having a good day. Though, Steve did try his hardest not to let stuff like that slip. Bruce was starting to help in that area more, as well. Natasha asked that he come and help James learn something to help keep him centered and calm. So he’d been meditating and trying yoga. James seemed to especially enjoy the scented candles that Natasha started to bring for those sessions - especially the Butterscotch Maple ones. Sometimes, when Steve just couldn’t help himself, he’d sit in the next room and listen to what Bruce and James were going through, and follow along. 

Sometimes, he felt better. Sometimes, it didn’t help at all. 

Logan came and went, mostly to check in on the twins. But Steve could usually count on having a drink with him. If they were lucky, Bucky might join them. Sam did, once, and brought Jim. They didn’t come back, though. Sam said that it was too depressing to listen to the conversation, and he usually didn’t mind, but the counselor in him was rising up and he didn’t want to butt in with information and other things that he knew wouldn’t be welcome. Jim had felt like he was intruding. He could relate to a lot of what was being said, but it was just too heavy for him. 

Those talks tended to help, but it was still getting to be too much, recently. Clint had offered him a week at the “casa al Barton”, but, as much as Steve adored the kids, he knew that wasn’t what he needed. 

He needed Tony. And he’d realized that the day after Tony got into his binge. 

Natasha had tried to help, and Peter was trying his best to be available and caring, but it was all just rubbing Steve the wrong way, and he had to retreat many times to the gym or his room, just to escape everything. 

Now, he was sitting in the common room, hoping to get some of his nerves out by sketching. He could wait for Tony, because he knew it would take more than just a small break for him to deal with this. He didn’t want to majorly sidetrack Tony. Clint came in and sat next to him. Steve just kept staring at his page. 

It was silent for a bit, and then Clint looked over at Steve. 

“You know… you have to move the pencil onto the page in order to draw. It doesn’t work if you just stare at it. Trust me, I’ve tried.”

Steve huffed and rolled his eyes. “I’m well aware. I just can’t think of anything to draw.” It wasn’t helping very much. And he could tell that the disappointment was showing on his face, because Clint clapped him on the shoulder and then ruffled his hair. 

“It’s alright, kid. We all have days like that.” He paused. “Um, I know that you’ve been having a rough time. You need to talk to Tony, right? Nothing else seems like it’s helping.”

Steve winced, just quiet for a few moments before, eventually, nodding. “Yeah. He’d… It’d help.”

Clint nodded and then narrowed his eyes, “Then… why aren’t you down there?”

Steve frowned at him, “Tony’s working. I don’t want to interrupt.”

“He’s on a binge, he needs us to give him breaks sometime.”

“Yeah, but… It won’t be just a short break. I don’t want to be a bo-”

“If you say ‘bother’ I’ll punch you.” Steve’s mouth clicked shut, and Clint raised an eyebrow. “That man would do anything for any of us, Steve. He’d certainly stop working to give you some support.” He glanced at the elevator. “It’s been a week anyways. He needs to stop.”

Steve looked back down at his blank page, considering for a moment. He took a deep breath and then stood up. He stared at the elevators, and then stepped forward. For a moment, he turned to give Clint a small smile. “Thanks.”

Clint grinned and gave him a thumbs up. Steve chuckled and gave him a small thumbs up in return. 

He continued to the elevator and headed down to the lab. He took deep breaths as he went, just hoping to center himself a little, he and Tony hadn’t spent much time together lately. The door opened and he could hear Tony’s music blasting through the walls. Steve sighed and dreaded opening the lab door. 

“JARVIS can you please turn down Tony’s music?”

“Of course, Captain.”

The music went down, and Steve sighed in relief. He walked into the lab and waved a little as Tony looked up, the music fading all the way out. 

“Hey, sport. Everything alright up there?”

Steve shrugged, “Yeah, everything’s alright. I’m just… I mean…”

Tony frowned and set down his tools. “Did Peter blow something up?”

He couldn’t help a small laugh, “No. Peter’s fine.”

“Are you sure? You sound a little off.”

Steve came closer, a little hesitantly. Tony’s frown deepened and he turned towards him more fully. Steve tried to perk up. 

“I just thought… maybe you could take a break?”

Tony’s arms crossed and he smirked a little, “Cut the bull Steve. What’s up?”

Steve ducked his head a little, sheepish. “Well… It’s been weird the last few days… and I didn’t want to bother you because, well, you’re working, and I didn’t want to interrupt your flow-”

“Literally, you guys have been interrupting me all week.

Steve could feel himself starting to pout. “Tony, this would take longer than just a ten minute break… I need… I just…” He sighed. “Nothing else is helping and I… and I don’t know what to do.”

Tony watched him for just a moment and then nodded, turning to put away some of the tools he’d been using and but down the programs he has running. 

Without turning, but with gentle authority, he gestured towards the couch and said, “Go sit. This’ll take me just a couple of minutes.”

Steve nodded and moved to sit, shoulders still quite stiff even as he started to feel more comfortable in the space. He leaned back a little as Tony finally started to come over. Tony shook his head just a little. 

“You are way to tense, kid.”

Steve rolled his eyes. “I’m just-”

“Don’t even. I know I’m right.”

So Steve just shut his mouth.

Tony sat next to him and put an arm around his shoulders, just to start. Relief pulsed under Steve’s skin, and he took a deep breath, leaning into Tony’s side. Tony kissed the crown of Steve’s head, and sighed softly. Steve could feel it.

“It’s been a while, hasn’t it?” Tony murmured. 

Steve’s shoulders came up a little around his ears, and he nodded. “I… I’m sorry.”

Tony shook his head, rubbing Steve’s shoulder. “Hey, nah. You’ve been busy, and there are other people that can help you. That’s not a bad thing.” 

“Yeah…?”

He rubbed Steve’s shoulders, “Yeah, Steve.”

Steve took a deep breath and started to relax more against Tony. After a couple minutes of silence, he murmured a small, “Thank you.”

He could feel Tony’s smile, and the older man was gentle as he pulled Steve to lie down. It took a bit of shuffling, but Tony was eventually laid back, Steve’s head resting on his shoulder. Steve’s eyes closed as he relaxed, just focusing on breathing deep. Tony’s hands rubbed his shoulders and pet his hair, and he felt himself totally relax, sighing contentedly. 

Steve’s ear was pressed against Tony’s shoulder, just a little above where his heart sat, and he could hear it’s beat. He could hear how Tony’s breaths were starting to level out and become deeper. He couldn’t blame the older man for starting to fall asleep, not really. He’d been awake much longer than any person should have to stay up. And yet, it made a lump start to form in his throat. 

Tony’s hands were slowing in their motions and, when Steve looked up, his eyes were closed. Without meaning to, Steve whimpered softly. He didn’t want to be left alone here, even if they were touching. He needed Tony, needed to be able to talk to him and listen to him chatter about his projects or other simpler, less important things. Fun things. Anything. 

Tears gathered in his eyes and he ducked his head, trying to make them go away. He sniffled as quietly as he could, trying to make the tears go away, make his nose unplug. He swallowed hard, trying to get the lump to go down. But all he did was make himself choke and sob. 

Almost immediately, Tony’s hand was on his cheek, tipping his Steve’s face up. His eyes were open, newly alert, if still a little cloudy around the edges. 

“Steve, what’s wrong? What happened?”

Steve looked away, not wanting to answer. He didn’t want to sound selfish, didn’t want to deprive Tony of something he needed. He swallowed hard and shook his head. Tony’s grip on his jaw tightened just a little. 

“No, you can’t do that. Please, Steve. You don’t cry often. What can I do to help.”

The cloudiness in his eyes had been replaced with worry, and Steve couldn’t hold back. Not when Tony asked like that. He deserved Steve’s honesty. 

Steve’s head ducked. “You… You were fallin’ asleep… I didn’t… I didn’t want you to… go.” He looked back up at him, quickly, “But if you need it, then I… I’ll be fine. I don’t… I don’t wanna make things hard for you.”

Tony shook his head, “I’m sorry I was falling asleep there. I should’ve paid more attention.”

“But it’s been a week. I should’ve waited.”

Tony’s eyebrow raised, “Steve. What did I tell you? The first time?”

Steve bit his lip, as if he had to think about it. As if he hadn’t repeated it to himself like a mantra any other time he had doubts about whether Tony would see him or not. 

“‘It’ll always be okay’.”

Tony nodded, “And I meant it.” He pulled him up a little more so that he could wrap his arms around Steve, hugging him tightly. “I’m always gonna be here for you Steve. I promise.”

Steve hid his face against Tony’s neck as he hugged back tightly, more tears slipping. 

“Okay, Tony… Okay…”

He felt Tony nod, “Good.” A kiss was pressed to his temple. “I’m gonna take care of you, Steve. Whenever you need me. I promise.”

Steve sobbed once and nodded. Tony’s hand came up to squeeze the back of his neck, then pet his hair. He just held him, hugged him until he was calm again, lax and sniffling in Tony’s arms. He rubbed Steve’s back a few minutes more before patting his shoulder. 

“I dunno about you, kid, but I could use some food. And I think you should at least have some water after that.”

Steve’s throat was still tight, so he just nodded. That seemed to be enough of an answer, Tony helping him up and putting an arm around his shoulders as they walked up to the common floor’s kitchen together. Tony had Steve sit and grabbed him a couple water bottles from the fridge. 

“Drink these, please.” He paused a moment, “Are you hungry?”

Steve took a couple sips of his water, just to help open his throat a little. “Um… I… I could eat.”

Tony nodded and turned to the fridge to make a few sandwiches. Steve just watched him, feeling his eyes prickle again. He’d missed his times with Tony, and he was really feeling it now. 

A plate with three sandwiches was set in front of him, and Tony sat at his right, two sandwiches on his own plate. Steve waited a minute until Tony started eating, but then began to eat as well, oddly famished, he realized, as he ate. Tony’s knee was pressed up against his own, and it gave him some comfort. Even though he’d had an extra sandwich, Steve finished eating at about the same time as Tony, and reached to gather their plate. Tony stopped him, shaking his head, and picked up the plates. 

“But, Tony, you-”

“Worked all week, I know. But I’m taking care of you right now. Calm down. We can nap in a minute. Because I’m sure you need it, too.”

Steve shut up, then, just watching Tony putter around the kitchen for a moment before he came over to take Steve’s hand, leading him away from the table and over to the elevator. 

“Would you like to head to your room, or mine?”

Steve looked at Tony and decided that he didn’t need to be in his own room to relax. Tony needed to be able to sleep as well as possible. “Yours, Tony.”

He nodded and led Steve into the elevator before pressing the correct button. They were silent on the way up, not really needing to speak. Tony started to list to the side, but Steve kept him upright until the doors opened. Tony took a deep breath and led him through the penthouse to the back, where his bedroom was. He ushered Steve in and then shut the door.

“JARVIS, let me know if anyone comes up. Don’t let anyone inside the bedroom.”

“Of course, Sir.” 

Steve sat on the side of the bed until Tony faced him, and the older man shook his head, sighing. “Lay down, Steve. Give me a minute to get my face washed, and I’ll put on some clean clothes. Just chill.”

Tony grabbed the clothes before going into the bathroom, shutting the door. 

Steve felt cold, then. Alone, again. It took a few minutes for him to remind himself that Tony would be right back, and he didn’t need to worry. He laid down on his back and took deep breaths. He waited. 

It wasn’t long at all before Tony came out, looking a little fresher. He smiled at Steve and came to lay down next to him. He tried to get Steve to roll over so that he might hold him better, but Steve refused, pulling Tony down to hold him instead. Tony looked up at him, confused. 

“Steve-”

“You need more rest than me, and… I wanna help you, too.”

Tony just smiled and shook his head, letting his head drop after a moment, his head pillowed on Steve’s chest. 

“Alright. But you can’t complain that I cling like an octopus.”

Steve huffed a small, but genuine, laugh. 

“I really don’t have a problem with that.”

Tony also huffed a small laugh, and gently patted Steve’s belly. “Good. Sleep, kid. Take a load off.”

Tony fell asleep first, of course. It took Steve a little longer, but he eventually drifted off, warm outside and in - more so than he had been in months. No dreams bothered him as he rested the next few hours, and when he woke up to Tony’s arms and legs wrapped tightly around him, he couldn’t help but grin down at him and hold him back just as tightly. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh man, guys, this was a crazy year for me. And I spent a lot of times when I just needed a break, working on this. You guys have really kept me going, and I appreciate, and want to thank all of you who have read this - any bit of it. Thank you, so, so much. 
> 
> I love you all! See you on the flip side.


End file.
